


Great and Precious Things

by brittishmenorbust



Category: Marvel Cinematic Universe
Genre: Arranged Marriage, F/M, Fluff, Friends to Lovers, Friendship, Hurt/Comfort, Magic, Romantic Fluff, Slow Burn, Thor (Marvel) is Not Stupid, thor is your friend
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2020-08-29
Updated: 2020-09-24
Packaged: 2021-03-06 22:47:16
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 14
Words: 42,218
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/26166616
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/brittishmenorbust/pseuds/brittishmenorbust
Summary: In a world where society is divided on magic, you are sent to Asgard as a potential bride for Thor. You discover only a friend in him, but his brother Loki on the other hand, understands you in ways even he doesn't know.A slow burn, friends to lovers tale of trust and understanding.
Relationships: Loki/Reader, Loki/you, Sif/Thor
Comments: 54
Kudos: 146





	1. Mages are Damned

Your shoes hit the cobblestones quickly as you tried not to look at the newly vandalized wall of the palace. 

MAGES ARE DAMNED

The wall was marred with what you assumed must be the blood of an animal. It was as if the wall itself was damned. Every time you glanced at it, your heart stung, your knees threatened to give out.    
It was a clear message from a lot of the townspeople to you, though they did not know it. You, their princess, were not welcome here.

Tensions were rising, and you were not unhappy to be getting away for a few months. This vandalism, now being attended to by your reluctant palace guards, was the friendliest action the people had shown towards your kind. Plenty with far less luxury to hide their talents as you had been beaten, even burned for their gifts. 

The Cold Princess, they called you. At first you’d been hurt. You understood why they thought you were distant. Instead of smiling at the little children who greeted you as you passed by in the yearly parades through the streets, you focused on the road ahead. To them it looked aloof, but in a crowd with so much pressure on you, it was all you could do to focus, to make sure no essence of magic escaped you.

“Have you finished packing, darling?” you heard your father’s voice from the threshold of your room.

You smiled at him, grateful to see him in a moment of anxiety. He did not think you cold at least. Perhaps slightly independent. It was easier to hide your gifts around people you knew, thankfully. 

Your father opened your door and walked in, stepping closer to the bed as you closed your last bag. A servant took it away to join the others in the carriage, leaving you alone in the room together. 

“You look more and more like her every day,” he marveled. 

“So you say,” you smiled weakly.

“Your mother was--”

“The most beautiful woman you’ve ever known,” you smiled, rolling your eyes. “I know.”

He smiled back, with a heavy sadness in his eyes.

“I will miss you dearly,” he muttered. 

You closed the distance between the two of you and hugged him fiercely. It was moments like this when you considered telling him, considered letting him in on a secret no one else knew.

But you couldn’t. No one could ever know lest you endanger yourself or them. You pulled away from your father as your maid and trusted friend entered. 

“Gross, I’ll come back when there’s less emotion in here,” Leia said, rolling her eyes and pretending to leave. 

“Shut up,” you teased, stepping away from your father and running to the door. You pulled her inside as she giggled. 

“You’ll take care of her, Leia?” your father asked. 

“Nah, I’ll ditch her the moment we’re in Asgard,” she smiled. Your father gave her a smirk. 

“Good luck,” he said, and kissed your forehead.    
You couldn’t say goodbye. Not in so many words, so you let that last tender touch be your goodbye, and followed Leia out to the waiting carriage. The landscape went by slowly as you made your way to the neighboring kingdom. At first it was silent, as she knew you liked it. But when she couldn’t hold it in any longer, she broke the silence. 

“Do you think he’ll be as handsome as they say?” Leia asked excitedly.

You rolled your eyes, laughing. 

“Probably not,” you answered. “Everyone builds him up to be this golden haired God, but I think he’ll at least have a hairy mole somewhere,” you winked. Leia giggled. 

“A marriage of a Hairy-Moled-God and The Cold Princess,” she said. “An odd couple for sure.”

“We don’t know that we’ll actually want to get married,” you pointed out. “It’s merely a suggestion.”

“A suggestion that would relieve a lot of tensions between the kingdoms,” Leia muttered. “No pressure or anything.”

“Fuck,” you muttered, rubbing your forehead with your hand.

“Hey, worst case, if he is a hairy-moled dick, you can just say fuck it, and marry Loki,” she teased.

“Ha!” you nearly screamed the laugh. “Marry a puppy or a snake. As if there’s a competition.”

“As long as you marry someone in that damn family,” she shrugged. “I’m tired of all the blood on the streets.”

The mood in the carriage dropped severely then, and you realized the power you unwittingly held. The older you got, the more you realized that figureheads and public perceptions mattered. You’d always known this, as you’d been aware enough, even as a child to hide your powers from those who did not understand it. Now, you saw that people simply wanted leaders. If those leaders were in love, they’d love their neighbor. If the leaders were at war, they would war with their neighbors. Your father and Odin had some long standing quarrel over land and policy that left the threat of war hanging constantly in the air. 

With the tension of magic haters mixed with the threat of war, it felt like you were in a pot ready to boil over. Odin had long searched for someone worthy of marrying his son, and having gone through a long list of potential mates for his golden child, you were near last on the list. 

You wondered if Thor had rejected them, or his father. What had been so wrong with all of the neighboring kingdom’s princesses, you wondered, that they should find themselves potentially enlisting you? Still, whatever reason they had, it worked in your kingdom’s favor. Or it would, if you were chosen, and if you chose them.

It was easy to be alone with your thoughts in the carriage, watching the world go by. You felt your magic settle, like a sleeping wolf upon your heart in times like this. Times where you weren’t threatened, weren’t stressed. It relaxed, allowed you to be. When you pulled up to the shining golden gates of Asgard, however, it stirred, sensing change and potential danger. 

Leia held your hand as you entered the gates and found your way up to the main entrance of the castle. You had expected no fanfare on your behalf, but you were surprised. Many people dressed quite nicely surrounded the area where your carriage stopped. A well dressed man opened the door, and you and Leia exited to find the king and queen along with their two sons standing on the stairs to the palace, waiting for you.

Your magic stirred in your chest, vibrating with the electricity of a coming storm. You breathed deeply to calm it, fearing an outbreak now would mean your head rolling down those stairs. You knew that both Thor and Loki possessed magic in their own ways. Thor wielded a magic hammer, eligible only to those worthy of handling such power. You supposed that’s why the people tolerated it. Along with his birthright to rule, and the power being summoned only in good will, it seemed fair and good. Just like him.

Loki on the other hand, was more complex. While any peasant would rather lose a hand than use magic in public for fear of reaction, Loki seemed to revel in his ability to display it without consequence. His birthright, given to him through his adoption, absolved him from most public punishment. While magic was not strictly illegal, the public seemed to react as though it were. Loki, however, was safe in his privilege. You envied him this luxury.

“Your majesties,” you greeted, curtseying and bowing your head slightly. 

“My lady,” Thor answered, bowing his head slightly as well. The other royals did similarly. 

“It is an honor to be called here,” you said, as your father had told you to do. “This is my maid, Leia. She is my most trusted friend and companion.”

She bowed again. 

“Lovely to have the both of you,” Queen Frigga spoke.    
She was even more beautiful than she’d been described. Her amber hair fell perfectly in waves down to her waist, as she smiled at you with kind eyes. Descriptions of Odin had been more or less accurate. While he wasn’t as tall as he’d been made out to be, he was just as regal. His son, Thor, had no hairy mole that you could see. In fact, he was more god-like than you cared to admit. Traditionally handsome with eyes just like his mother’s, warm and welcoming. Similarly to his father, Loki was aptly talked of as well. His dark hair framed an angular and severe face. His dark eyes seemed to see more than you’d have liked, and you found you couldn't meet them for long.

Your magic clenched around your heart fearfully, and it took you a moment to ensure you maintained your composure.

“We’ll have Sybil show you to your rooms. You’re welcome to explore the palace as you wish, but we do hope you’ll join us for a welcome dinner,” Frigga explained. She gestured to a young servant who bowed and moved forward to help with your belongings. 

“That would be lovely,” you smiled. “I’m sure Leia and I would like an hour or two to collect ourselves and settle in, but we’re all yours for dinner.”

Frigga looked almost embarrassed, and you realized the invitation was not extended to your maid. 

“I’ll see to your unpacking this evening, m’lady, no need for me to join you,” Leia saved the moment. 

Although your kingdoms neighbored each other, it was apparent to you that there were some customary differences you’d have to get used to while staying here. They seemed a bit more focused on class and rank, something your kingdom and you personally didn’t value as highly.

“Right,” you breathed. “ _ I _ will see you at dinner then.”

“We’ll send Sybil to collect you when it is time,” Frigga nodded. 

With a nod to the rest of the family still stood on the steps, you followed the young girl inside the castle. 

You’d heard about this castle, even seen a few drawings of it, but they did not do it justice in the slightest. The ceilings were so high, you were sure it could contain a small weather system. The stone looked both old and new, ancient and yet untouched. Gold inlays on the doors, painted ceilings, marble sculptures, and massive paintings of wars won and lost had you wide eyed and nearly breathless as you walked. Leia for once in her life, seemed similarly dumbstruck. This was not anywhere close to what you were used to. You knew your kingdom was more humble than theirs, but the gravity of the wealth, the extravagance, was something you’d not anticipated. 

Your room was no less elegant. With space enough for an entire family to live, you had a huge bed, several dressers, a large closet, a floor to ceiling window accompanied by a sofa, a grand piano, several bookcases, and a fireplace with reading chairs. 

“Now you have to marry him,” Leia said, dropping your bag roughly on the ground while staring at the room. “I want to live here.”

You sighed and rolled your eyes. You saw the door to her servant’s quarters next to the closet. 

“Shall we see if your room is also its own castle?” you suggested. She nodded eagerly and the two of you walked through the door.

Her room was smaller than yours, with less furnishings and a smaller bed, but it was still larger than you’d ever have use to use. She seemed in awe of this room almost equally, and you were glad at least one of you would be enjoying this trip.

“You’re welcome to sleep in my bed if this one sucks,” you offered. “I have a feeling we could fit a small village on it.”

“Are you trying to seduce me?” she winked, jumping on her bed. You chuckled. “Nah, this bed is made of clouds, I’m good.”

You laughed and left her to settle in while you unpacked. Going through your things, you started to feel self conscious. None of the gowns you’d bought matched up to the quality of fabrics they had here. You felt so much less than these people already. You tried reminding yourself that possessions weren’t everything. You still had your brains, your personality, and much more to offer the prince, should you want to.

A heavy knock on the door startled you, making you realize you’d been staring at the hem of your dress for a few moments. 

“Come in,” you called. 

Thor peaked his head in nervously around the door. 

“Hello,” you smiled. He smiled back and opened the door all the way. 

“I hope I’m not intruding,” he offered. “I know you probably need a chance to unwind, but I wanted to see how you were settling in.”

“It’s fucking brilliant!” you heard Leia scream from her room through the open door. 

You covered your mouth trying to hide a chuckle. Thor smiled, thankfully, and you reminded yourself to talk to Leia about trying to at least act like she cared what you and others thought of her.

“We’re very pleased,” you managed. 

“Good,” he said. He held his hammer in his hands and seemed to be nervously gripping it. 

“Are you alright?” you asked, taking a step towards him. 

He ran a hand through his hair, and it caught you off guard just how beautiful he was. He was vulnerable, anxious, but open.

“I must admit, princess, I am a little nervous,” he laughed. 

You stepped quickly across the room to him and put a hand on his arm. 

“Why would you ever be nervous around me?” you asked, genuinely curious. 

“You are not the first I have been offered to wed,” he explained, though you knew. “But you are by far the most beautiful and kind, and for that, I wish to make a good impression on you.”

“So far so good,” you promised with a smile. His eyes dropped to his hammer. 

“I am afraid that you may think badly of me for using magic,” he explained. “But I--”

“I do not,” you promised him. 

“You don’t?” he asked. “But your kingdom is notorious for--”

“I know,” you admitted. “But I do not share those barbaric beliefs. Trust me.”   
“My brother will be glad to hear that as well,” he admitted. 

“Something tells me Loki cares not what I think,” you smirked. “But if it will put anyone else at ease, know that I do not care about using magic. I respect yours especially.”

“You do?” he asked. 

“Well, you must be worthy to wield your powers, no? Or so the legend goes anyway.”

“Aye, that is true,” he nodded. 

“Seems a good way to ensure you use it for good. I think many people feel it is a dangerous tool in untrained and uneducated hands, and I can’t say I blame them.”   
“I agree,” he sighed in relief. “You can be assured that my brother is both of those things. He’s the smartest man I know.”

You smiled, almost to yourself at that comment. Thor seemed authentic in this sentiment, but you were sure that Loki would never speak so highly or so genuinely about his brother. And you were sure that Loki was indeed educated and practiced in his magical arts. Unlike you, he’d had his whole life to train, to learn his powers. You rarely got a moment to yourself, let alone a moment when you were a hundred percent sure you would not be discovered. You’d barely uncovered what you were capable of, and part of you didn't want to know.

Thor put down his hammer and held out both hands to you, palm up. 

“I want you to feel safe here, princess,” he said. You laid your hands atop his. “You must come to me if ever you feel otherwise.”

You could have cried. You almost wanted something to be wrong with this man. He was incredibly handsome, worthy of wielding a powerful magic, and so, so kind.

“Are you alright?” he asked, seeing a tear escape. 

“Yes,” you answered, wiping the offending water away. “I’m just… It’s been a long day, and I feel so welcomed here. Thank you.”

“Of course,” he said. He left your hands and picked up his hammer. He made his way back to the door. “Until dinner,” he nodded, and left.

You knew she would be coming out of the room the moment he left, and you turned with a look ready for her. 

“Shut up,” you warned before she said anything. 

Leia put her hands up and shook her head. 

“I didn’t say anything,” she defended. 

“You didn’t have to.”

“All I’m saying is, you literally couldn’t do better. Also we need to live here because I physically cannot sleep in any other bed. That one’s perfect.”

You looked at the door where Thor had just left. Could you see yourself with him? Living here? You’d have to wait and see.


	2. The Call of Ones Own

Leia helped you pick the best of your dresses to wear to dinner that night. She styled your hair and helped you with your makeup. Your eyes contrasted beautifully with the green dress you’d chosen, and your hair was curled to perfection. You felt beautiful for now at least, until you were reminded of the standard of appearance here, you were sure.

“Don’t be nervous,” Leia scolded. 

“I’m not,” you lied. 

“Your hands are doing that  _ thing _ ,” she smirked. 

You quickly hid them behind you best you could. Your  _ thing, _ as she called it, was the best you could do to busy your hands so no magic escaped them. With your nerves on high alert, your magic was waiting just beneath your skin, threatening to seep out at any moment. 

Your magic had taken many forms in the few times you’d either tried, or had an accident. You’d seen electric shots like lightning, you’d seen a blue flame, and once your hand even turned into a bird-like talon. You did not care to see what would happen tonight if you had a slip up, and so tried to focus on your breath.

“Talk to Thor of meat and battle,” Leia offered. You shot her a look. “What? It’s guaranteed to be a hit for conversation with him.”

“I’m sure he has more to him than those two interests,” you scolded her.

She shrugged, seemingly unsure. A knock on the door told you that Sybil was there to collect you for dinner. You stood and walked slowly to the door, still focusing on your breaths. 

When you opened the door, however, you found Thor instead of Sybil.

“M’lady,” he greeted, offering you his arm to take. A quick glance back at Leia showed you she was ecstatic at this turn of events. “Sybil will be along to show you to your dinner,” Thor offered, and you gave Leia a small smile before taking Thor’s arm and letting him lead you out into the hallway. 

“Sybil, you’re looking quite different,” you teased him. He chuckled. 

“I was in the neighborhood and thought I’d pick you up myself,” he said. 

“You joke, but this castle is basically a small town,” you noted. 

“It is a magnificent home to be sure,” he nodded. “Is your palace…” You could tell he didn’t want to say “smaller” for fear of offending you, so you jumped in.

“Yes, it’s quite a bit smaller,” you laughed. “I’ll get a nice figure just walking to the bathroom here.”

“M’lady, your figure is one of great beauty already,” he smiled warmly at you. 

You noticed two things in that moment. One, that your heart did not flutter, nor your cheeks blush. Two, that he did not seem to mean it as an attempt on advancement towards you. It was as if he had simply stated a fact that you were in good shape, as a doctor might.

You were glad to have a congenial partner to walk through the halls with, as it was a long walk to the grand hall. It would take you a long while to learn this palace, and you loathed having to have a guide until then. Perhaps you could get your hands on a map of some kind, though the thought of looking like a tourist was also abhorrent. 

Stowing away the thought, you focused on the grand hall that now stood before you. Almost the entire room was set down a few steps, with long tables filling the lower section. On the far side of the room, at the top of the steps, was the table for the royals. More ornate and well decorated, you saw the family waiting for you. The rest of the lower tables were empty, as this was apparently a private dinner, but you were sure 1,000 people could easily eat in here together.

Thor lead you to the table and pulled out a chair for you across from Loki. The king and queen sat on opposite ends of the table, leaving the three of you to fill in the center. Thor sat next to you.

You tried not to make eye contact with Loki, but you could feel him studying you as soon as you were at the table. It felt rather exposing for some reason, as if he could see through your dress. 

“You look lovely,” Frigga greeted you. “One never would have guessed you’d traveled the whole day. Oh to be young again,” she smiled. 

“I’m very good at sitting in a carriage all day,” you laughed. “A lot of my time is spent sat in a chair reading anyway, might as well get somewhere when I’m done with my book I suppose.”

Loki seemed to perk up at this, leaning forward slightly, the edges of his mouth twitching upwards just a little.

“An avid reader?” Thor asked, seemingly genuinely interested. 

“Yes,” you admitted. “And yourself?” 

“My brother is the scholar of the family,” he presented proudly, gesturing to his brother. 

Loki shrank away from this attention, and looked almost guilty.

“Your library must be amazing,” you marveled, almost to yourself. “Perhaps you could show me sometime?” 

It wasn’t high on your list to be Loki’s friend, but if you were going to convince this family to take you in as one of their own, you supposed you needed everyone’s vote.

“I--” Loki started, but Thor answered for him before he could finish. 

“My brother would love to,” he said. Loki sighed and closed his eyes for a moment. “Just as long as I then get to take you to The Great Lake.”

“What’s that?” you asked. 

“Well, you mentioned liking to end up somewhere when you were done reading, so I would like to take you somewhere worth going. My favorite place in Asgard.”

“Sounds lovely,” you smiled. 

“Tomorrow?” Thor asked. 

“Library and a lake,” you said. “Sounds like the perfect day.”

“Wonderful,” Thor smiled.

Loki looked rather less enthused, and avoided your gaze.

You started eating as the family assumed their normal conversation patterns. Thor and his father seemed to get along, more or less, while they talked of the news from the villagers and the palace residents. Loki was fairly quiet unless engaged in speaking with his mother. You were still tired from the journey, and didn’t mind being somewhat ignored. You answered when spoken to, and sometimes gave a small contribution here or there, but for the most part you were happy to listen, and more importantly, eat.

When dinner was over, you stood and bowed to the king and queen as they made their exits, leaving you, Thor, and Loki alone at the table. 

“Would you care for a drink?” Thor asked. The question was directed at both you and Loki. 

“No, brother,” Loki declined.

“Please,” Thor asked, rounding the table to clasp his brother on the shoulder. “I would love for you to have a drink with us. After all, we may become family.”

The openness of the arrangement was still strange for you. You weren’t sure about your feelings towards the situation in general, let alone towards Thor. Loki’s eyes met yours for a moment that you didn’t understand, before he reluctantly accepted the invitation. Thor led the three of you through a number of hallways and up some stairs to what you thought would be a rooftop, but turned out to be a stunning, very deep pool. Built into the slope of the hill towards the back of the castle, the pool was largely constructed of marble, with the same amount of extravagance afforded to the rest of the estate. You tried not to look too impressed. 

Thor walked over to a small bar and took out a few bottles. He then gestured for you to follow him to a seating area. It had a loveseat and a chair, along with a low table in the center. Thor sat on the loveseat, and Loki on the chair, leaving you to stand and look at the spot meant to be for you. It felt like too much, being so close to him so soon, even if you’d been arm in arm earlier. You needed space, you realized. That would be a big difference between you and Thor. He didn’t seem to tire of people, you needed some time to yourself. So instead, you took off your shoes and sat by the pool, dipping your feet in the cool water. The pool was rounded so you could easily sit and still face the boys while they lounged.

Thor poured you a glass of wine and you took it gratefully. He poured himself an even bigger glass, and let Loki serve himself. You stared wide-eyed at how quickly Thor downed the glass, and shared a look with Loki who seemed to chuckle at your reaction. Thor refilled his glass and drank again with impressive speed. 

“Princess,” he said, seemingly unphased by the amount of alcohol that would have you giggling like a schoolgirl.

“Yes,” you answered.

“Tell us about yourself.”

“I wouldn’t know where to begin,” you shook your head. 

“At the beginning, like most stories,” Loki offered.

“A story of my life,” you mused. “I suppose that’s what we are, stories. In the end, anyway.”

Something sparked behind Loki’s eyes and you had to tear your attention away to Thor.

“Well, I was born to my loving father and mother,” you started. “I had a lovely childhood until my mother passed away. I was only seven.”

You stared at your wine while you attempted to maintain your composure.

“We were very close, and it was a very hard blow. But my father and I remained close and got on the best we could. Leia, my maid you met earlier, she’s my best friend. We grew up together, explored together… I’m not sure what else to say,” you shrugged. “I enjoy reading, exploring… drinking,” you laughed, holding up your glass. “Though not as much as you, apparently,” you teased Thor.

He laughed and took another impressively long drink. 

“I do love it,” he sighed happily. “And I am sorry about your mother,” he added. 

“I lost my family as well,” Loki nodded. “Though Odin was kind enough to take me in when I was only a baby.”

For what felt like the tenth time that night, you shared a moment with Loki separate from Thor. Thor did not seem to notice this exile, and continued to drink. 

“We are happy to have such a wild creature amongst us,” he jested with his brother. “Keeps things interesting.”

You had little doubt of that. Thor began to substantiate that claim with tales of Loki’s amusing escapades, which then turned into stories of his own. You half listened, focusing instead on the feeling of the water on your feet and the weight of the night breeze. It took you a while after he’d stopped talking to realize you were no longer alone at the pool anymore. Loki now sat beside you, and you started, unsure when, during your zone-out, this had happened. 

“He does have a tendency to go on and on,” Loki offered.

You looked back at Thor who was now passed out. How long ago had that happened? How long had Loki been beside you?

“Sorry,” you muttered. “You must think me very rude.”

“Not at all,” Loki shook his head. “It was kind of you to listen for as long as you did.”

You chuckled. Loki was sitting cross legged, staring at the water. 

“Sounds like you get up to a bit of mischief here and there,” you said. 

“I do enjoy it,” he smirked. “Especially if it involves magic.”

You tingled at the word that came from his lips. If only you could tell him, if only you could finally tell someone. Still, you were hardly keeping your footing here as it was, no need to add unneeded obstacles. 

“Why do you think they let you get away with it?” you asked. “I know they’re a little more understanding in your kingdom than mine but I don’t understand it.”

“Fear,” he shrugged. “Odin is quite the powerful king. He does not love me, but nor would he allow any attack on the royal family. Any attack on me would mean certain death to the assailant, or worse,” he said. 

You blinked, unsure of how to unpack that. Odin did not love his son?

“Odin cares for you,” you promised, though you had no grounds to claim that.

He smiled sadly and shook his head. 

“Doesn’t matter to me,” he said, somewhat convincingly. “But it does matter that he protects me. That counts for something at least.”

“Do you think people will ever change their minds about magic?” you asked.

“People? No,” he answered. “A person, maybe.”

“One at a time,” you nodded. 

“Mmm, people as a whole are hateful,” Loki said. “But a person… Less so. Sometimes.”

You looked back at Thor, passed out on the loveseat, snoring. 

“What does your brother think?” you asked. 

“You’d have to ask him,” Loki shrugged. “My guess is he thinks everything is fine.”

You frowned at the water and hoped that wasn’t true. Loki stood, and held out a hand for you. 

“It’s late,” he offered. “Let me walk you to your room.”

You took the proffered hand, and your magic stood at alert. It was as if the sleeping wolf had heard a call, one of its own, and responded. A shock ran through your hand right up to your heart, and you wondered if Loki felt it as well, for he seemed similarly startled.

“T-thank you,” you muttered, trying very hard to keep control.

You did not walk easily, nor arm in arm with Loki as you had with his brother earlier. The shock had left you uneasy and silent. It was difficult to tell if Loki simply preferred silence, or had nothing to say to you. Still, you could feel his eyes on you, watching you as you walked.

After a long walk, you made it to your room.

“Goodnight, m’lady,” he bowed slightly. It seemed strange to have such a formal goodbye after spending an evening together, but you bowed in return and slipped into your room.

You found Leia on your bed reading, but she perked up when she heard you enter.

“Tell me EVERYTHING,” she smiled.


	3. The Lake and the Library

You groaned and vaulted yourself onto the behemoth of a bed next to her. You hid your face in the bed. 

“They were very kind,” you reported.

“You spent more time dining than I expected,” she said.

“We had drinks after, me and the princes.”

“Ooo,” she cooed. “Loki chaperoned you to keep your honor intact?” she teased.

“I think Thor genuinely likes his brother,” you laughed. “Though the feeling is not as warmly reciprocated.”

“I wonder if Loki disapproved of the other girls,” Leia posited. 

“I believe that would sway Thor’s opinion, perhaps even over his parents’.”

“Well, if we want to win this thing, we’ll have to win over Loki.”

“It’s not a game,” you laughed at her eagerness. 

“It is, and we’re winning,” she said. “So long as Loki likes you?”

“He’s hard to read,” you shrugged. “I don’t think he  _ dislikes _ me.”

You thought of the way he watched you, the shock you’d felt when your hands touched. It was an acquaintanceship unlike anything you’d ever had. Were his watchful eyes admiring his brother’s potential wife? Or studying her for errors?

“You should spend some time with him, do something he likes,” she offered.    
“I’m actually seeing them both tomorrow,” you said. “Thor wants to take me to his favorite lake, and Loki the library.”

“Playing both sides?” she asked, half-joking. 

“I’m only playing my side,” you promised. “I know you love it here, and it would help our kingdom to have me marry here, but I am selfish enough to want to marry for love.” You picked at your fingernails in thought for a moment. “Is that wrong?”

“No,” Leia said decidedly. 

You smiled at her conviction and got up off the bed. 

“I’m going to get ready for bed,” you said. “Don’t fall asleep on my bed.”

She rolled her eyes but didn’t move. 

“I won’t,” she said.

You took a long bath to ruminate on the evening’s events. The dinner had gone well, though you had been quiet. You wondered if that would count against you. The evening by the pool had been nice. Your magic still felt jittery from Loki’s touch, and you didn’t know what to make of it. It wasn’t something you’d felt before in your life, though you did make it a point not to interact with many people outside the family. 

When the water had run cold, you dried yourself off and slipped into a nightgown. You laughed to yourself when you saw that Leia had fallen asleep on your bed. She didn't even take up half of it, though she was laying on a slight diagonal. You slipped in beside her and worried yourself to sleep.

You woke to the sun through the thin curtains. It was late morning, but you hadn’t slept too well. You didn’t want to move, but you heard the door opening, and sat up, alert. It was only Leia, who you now realized wasn’t beside you in bed. Instead, she came bearing your breakfast on a platter. 

“You would not believe how fucking far it is to the kitchen,” she said, breathing a little heavy. “This castle is an actual maze designed to kill me.”

“I thought you loved it here,” you teased. She shot you a look. 

“I do. But I’d prefer it if our room was next to the kitchen.”

“Same,” you said. 

The two of you ate happily, and she helped you into the dress you’d be wearing for the day. The dress fell just above your knee, certain to not trip you should you have to walk through any woods to get to the lake. Leia braided your hair to stay out of your face, but still left enough down to fall in waves around your shoulders. 

You’d promised to meet Thor for your journey to the lake just before lunch so you could have a picnic there. You stayed in your room for the morning, lounging and reading with Leia. If you were to spend the whole day with real people, you didn’t want to leave your room until you absolutely had to.

When the thunderous knock came on your door, you got up and happily greeted Thor. With a wave to Leia, you were arm in arm again with the blonde prince. 

“How was your morning?” he asked. 

“Lovely,” you smiled. “How was yours? No hangover, I hope.”

“Never,” Thor promised. “I am sorry I fell asleep so abruptly last night,” he apologized. “I am sure Loki took good care of you.”

“He did,” you promised. 

“People think my brother is cold and distant, but he is truly caring.”

You couldn’t help but smile, thinking of your similarities.   
“My people call me The Cold Princess,” you offered. He made a face of disbelief.

“How?” he asked. 

“I don’t show much affection,” you shrugged. “At least towards people I don’t know.”

“I’ve been accused of the opposite,” he laughed. “I am too friendly, father says. Too trusting.”

“Sometimes I wish I could be,” you offered.

You’d finally made it out of the palace walls and onto the grounds. The trees were only slightly different than what you were used to, so it wasn’t hard to believe you were still in your kingdom. 

“I used to come to this lake as a boy and play for hours,” Thor remembered. “Loki didn’t like the water, but I love it.”

“Too bad it’s too cold to swim,” you lamented. 

“Perhaps in the summer,” he smiled. 

The way he kept alluding to your staying here, joining the family, seemed like it should be a good thing. And it wasn’t like you couldn’t see yourself living here, being close to Thor and his family, but it felt almost wrong. Not wrong, but not right either. It was hard to get straight in your head. 

You started nearing the lake as you walked along a well-groomed path, and were not disappointed. The lake was enormous, stretching so far as to make the trees on the other side look almost non-existent. Equally in its width it seemed more like a small ocean to you. Mountains rose behind it as if posing for a painting.

“Wow,” was the only thing you could say, as Thor watched you take in the natural beauty. 

He set down the small bag he’d been carrying and laid out a little blanket for the two of you, along with some food.

“It is beautiful, isn’t it?” he asked. 

You nodded, watching the sun shining on the water and the birds dipping in the sky.

“Do you have anything like it in your kingdom?” he asked.

“No,” you admitted. “Smaller lakes, a lot of ponds, but nothing like this.”

“We are very lucky to live in such a place,” he said. “And I am lucky to have met you.”

You couldn’t help but smile at the sincerity in his features. He was so warm and open, so easy to read. You were sure if he ever lied to you, you’d be able to tell. You took his hand, more as an experiment than an actual want to touch him. You felt nothing special, just his skin on your skin. You inspected his hand as if looking for an on switch that might match the feeling you’d had with his brother.    
“Are you a palm reader?” he asked, teasingly. 

“Sorry,” you laughed, realizing you’d been holding his hand and saying nothing. “I feel the same,” you added. “Lucky to have met you.”

He smiled at this, and you thought that now would have been a time that most men would have tried something, a kiss at least. But he did not. He turned his attention back to the lake and began telling you tales of his and Loki’s times here as children.

You listened this time, and heard a lot about their relationship, even if he didn’t know he was telling you. You heard how Thor was always the leader, and Loki always an independent companion, following when he felt like it, diverting when he didn’t. Thor had lamented that Loki didn’t care to play with a lot of his friends, nor did he now get along with the soldiers Thor led when needed. He had a lot of love for his brother though, and respected Loki’s need for solitude.

He asked you about your childhood, but there wasn’t as much to tell. You were not uninhibited as he had been, but you could not tell him why. You made it seem like the loss of your mother was the reason you’d spent your childhood largely with books and Leia, but that wasn’t the reason of course. Hiding magic had taken a lot of effort. Talking about your childhood made you miss your mother terribly. 

She was the only one who had ever known about your magic. Because she had given it to you. Her bloodline had always had mages, and strong ones at that. When you had your first outburst of magic during a tantrum when you were about five, you were alone with her. While you sat stunned, looking at the energy that had just burst from your hands, she looked mildly amused. It was then that she had to teach you, just a small child, the ways of the world you’d been born into. She helped you develop ways to keep it hidden that you still used now. But she had died, leaving you alone with your secret.

After you finished the story of how you and Leia rescued a feral kitten, you stopped talking. Thor was listening intently to your story with a smile. 

“What are you smiling at?” you asked. 

He shook his head and looked at the blanket. 

“Perhaps one day I will tell you, princess,” he said mysteriously. “But for now, I must bring you to your other appointment of the day.”

The library. You’d almost forgotten. Your face lit up with excitement and you helped Thor pack up the picnic. You tried to rush the walk back to the palace and he teased you for it. 

“I would accompany you as well, but I am afraid I would just fall asleep. It’s something about that room,” he shrugged. “But I hope you enjoy it.”

You rounded a corner to where Loki was pacing in front of a large double door. He didn’t see the two of you at first, and when you saw him, it seemed that he looked rather nervous. He seemed to be muttering to himself and gesturing with his hand as if practicing a speech. 

“Brother,” Thor announced himself, and Loki jumped. He straightened his jacket and smoothed his expression to one of indifference.

“How was the picnic?” Loki asked. 

“Wonderful,” you responded. “You have such a beautiful kingdom.”

“Take good care of her, brother,” Thor winked before walking away. 

Loki seemed puzzled by his brother’s parting words for some reason, but only for a moment before he turned to you. 

“Ready?” he asked. You nodded. 

He opened the large double doors to reveal the largest library you could have dreamt of. While the ceilings of the grand hall were high and empty, these heights were filled with books. The tallest shelves you’d ever seen, stretching for as long and wide as the lake you’d just marveled at. The ladders that accompanied these shelves would give you quite the workout. There were several fireplaces in strategic areas surrounded by comfortable chairs and low tables. You could see a desk for the librarian on one of the far walls, and wondered how one person could keep up with all of this.

You stared open-mouthed at the splendor, frozen. You heard a low chuckle next to you, pulling you out of your reverie.

“You may have a bit of drool there,” he noted, pointing to your lip. You thought he was joking. He was not. You wiped the drool away.

“This is your library?” you asked.    
“One of them,” he quirked an eyebrow. You let out a small squeal and he chuckled again.

It was strange to see a smile, albeit a small one, on his features. His face seemed most at home when it was scowling or silently judging. Still, this face was nice, inviting, and you hoped for your sake and Leia’s, that it was genuine.

“Where do I even start?” you asked. 

“Anywhere you’d like,” he offered. 

Taking a moment to pick a direction, you decided, and started walking. You scanned the books, picking out a few every row just at your eye level. One in particular stood out to you because of its cover, shining with golden inlays. It was up one level too high, but you thought you might be able to reach it without a ladder. One arm clutching the books you’d picked, you sent the other up to try to reach the book, standing on tip toe to help. Hearing Loki’s laughter again, you felt a hand on your hip as he steadied himself against you to reach the book for you. Again you felt that energy flow between you, like someone had just pricked a needle into your skin.

You turned against his hand and shared a look with him. Again it was almost impossible to read if he had felt it as well, or if he was just waiting for you to claim your prize. The sensation hadn’t stopped, as his hand had not yet left your hip as you’d turned. He stood with one hand on you, and one on the book. You were pressed against the bookshelf, and only now, looking up at him, did you realize how close he was. 

You hadn’t seen before just how green his eyes were, or how perfect his skin was. You found yourself an ardent student of his features then, and nothing could have pulled your attention away, but he soon removed his hand from you and took a step backwards, clearing his throat.

“The book,” he offered, not quite meeting your gaze. “It is a good one,” he added with a small smile, managing a glance at you.

Taking a moment to recover, you looked at the book for a distraction. You recognized the author.    
“I’ve read this author before,” you smiled. “He’s very good.”

“I will be interested to see what you think of it,” Loki said. 

You half heard him, as you started flipping through the first few pages. In a daze, you blindly found your way to a chair in front of a fire, placing the books absently on the desk in front of you and curling up to begin reading. It was only when you were two chapters in that you realized what you’d done. You’d completely ignored Loki. Looking up with a startled expression, you caught him in the chair opposite you, reading as well. Apparently he hadn’t been too offended. Sensing your gaze on him, he looked up with an amused smile.    
“It’s good, isn’t it?” he asked with a knowing grin.

Blushing with embarrassment, you put the book down. 

“I’m sorry I totally ignored you,” you said. “I just…”   
“No need,” Loki chuckled softly. “I’ve done just the same.”

“What are you reading?” you asked, peering at the title he held in his lap. 

“Re-reading an old favorite,” he said, lifting the book so you could read the title. 

“That’s one of mine as well,” you smiled. 

“You know it?”

“Well,” you nodded. “Something about it just clicks with me.”

“Me as well,” Loki said. 

He stared at you for a long moment before taking a breath and getting up from his chair. He seemed to think for a moment, staring into the fire, before turning to you.

“I should really bring you to dinner,” Loki noted. “I think we’re running rather late.”

“Oh,” you nodded, getting up. “Can I check these out and put them in my room first?”

“Probably a good idea.”

“Do I need to live here to use this library?” you asked. 

“No,” Loki laughed. “Any guest of the royals can do whatever they please. Simply take them.”

You smiled and gathered the myriad books you’d collected. Loki offered to assist you, but it felt good to hold the books in your arms, like holding new friends. He led you to your room as you discussed some of the finer points of the book he’d been reading. Not many had read that book, and you were excited to be able to talk about it. He must have felt the same, you had heard the passion in his voice as well. 

Leia was cleaning the room when you entered, and you registered the look of surprise on her features as she saw who you were with. 

“Just came to drop off some books before heading to dinner,” you said. “Are you actually cleaning?” you laughed. 

“I do do my job  _ sometimes _ ,” she rolled her eyes. 

“Uh huh, well make sure you get something to eat soon,” you made her promise. 

“Yes, master,” she mocked you. You laughed. 

Turning to Loki, you saw the look of curiosity across his face. 

“What’s the matter?” you asked, as you followed him out of the room.

“Forgive me,” he said. “I’ve just never seen that kind of rapport with a servant before.”

“Well, she’s just kind of my friend that helps me out for room and board,” you shrugged. “I don’t think of her as less than me or anything.”

“Mm,” he said, ruminating on this. 

“Do you?” you asked. 

“I’ve always been taught that some are more… important than others, I suppose,” Loki said. You frowned. That had always bothered you about your society. It didn't seem right that those without the luck to be born into higher ranks had to suffer or be perceived as less than.

“I would have thought you of all people would have understood what it might be like to not be born into royalty, not be so lucky, so able to…” you cut yourself off before ranting about your envy of his freedom to use his magic. “I’m sorry,” you said, catching yourself. 

For a moment you’d felt at liberty to be honest with him. You’d started to feel a kinship, but who were you kidding? You’d lost sight of your goal. You had to make Loki like you, that was the key to winning Thor’s affections. He probably wouldn’t like you if you kept accusing him of being a horrible person. You waited a moment before daring to meet his gaze, afraid of the scorn you might find there. When you did manage it, however, you didn’t see scorn, only that same curious face. 

“Do not apologize for speaking your mind,” he shook his head. “It is not often someone shifts my thinking,” he added. “So kudos to you.”

By now you’d reached the great hall, and he walked a bit faster after giving you a small smile, to join his family at the table. You took your time getting there, greeting Thor with a light hug.

“And how was the library?” Thor asked. “Everything you’d hoped for?”

He’d pulled you out of your daze and you nodded, smiling.

“And more,” you assured him. “I think I’ll be spending quite a bit of time in there,” you said. “When I’m not with you of course,” you laughed. 

“If you ever need someone to nap beside you in there, I’m your man,” he promised with a wink. “Though I feel you had the best companion for such an adventure today.”

He looked at his brother proudly and you nodded. With the exception of the strangeness of his touch and the near catastrophe of a conversation just now, he was the best companion. 

“It seems you had a lovely first full day here,” Odin addressed you from the far end of the table. 

“Yes, sir,” you nodded. “You have such a wonderful home.”

“Mm, yes, it will be a great place to host a winter wedding,” he smirked knowingly. You couldn’t help but blush. Did this mean he approved of you? Did that matter at all? Winter was only a month away, a faster timeline that you’d anticipated to decide.

“Father,” Thor chided. “Do not scare her away before she’s even unpacked her things.”

“I agree, it would be lovely,” you said, resting your hand atop Thor’s on the table. “I can imagine no better place than Asgard.”

You were pushing this despite your heart’s wavering. You liked Thor, yes, but could you love him? After only a day and a half it was impossible to tell of course, but everyone seemed to want to move so fast here. Tensions were high, and the people needed something to believe in, something new and promising. Loki’s gaze caught your attention, and you saw that his jaw was clenched. His eyes flitted away from your and Thor’s hands to the window when you looked at him.

“Well, you’ll see just how lovely an event here can be next week,” Odin said. 

“Why’s that?”

“We’re hosting a ball,” Frigga smiled. “An annual ball, just some extended family and friends we don’t get to see too often.”

“Sounds like fun,” you smiled, though you were cringing inside. It was hard enough to be around Thor and his family, let alone extended family and friends you’d also have to impress.

“It’s very joyous,” Thor promised. “You will stun many people, I’m sure.”

“Oh, I don’t know,” you laughed nervously. “I love all of your clothes here, mine hardly match up. Perhaps I can just hide behind you,” you joked. 

“Nonsense,” Thor declared. “Loki, who is that tailor you use? There’s a seamstress there that I have heard much about. What is her name?”

“Maria,” Loki answered.    
“Could you take the princess there tomorrow perhaps? You are on the short list of Maria’s good graces, perhaps you could have her whip up something beautiful in such a short time?”

Loki looked at you, and you felt like a small burden then.    
“I suppose, if it would please you,” Loki said to you. 

“Oh no, there’s no need--”

“Go with him,” Thor said. “That way I can be blindsided by your beauty upon seeing you at the ball.”

You consented, though you were unsure if Loki would resent you for such a menial task. The rest of dinner was fairly uneventful, and the king and queen again excused themselves leaving the three of you alone again. 

“Perhaps we should get to bed,” Loki suggested. “If we want to catch Maria, we will have to leave early.”

“Alright,” you nodded. “I will be sure to have Leia wake me before the sun.” He nodded. 

“M’lady, it was an honor to have your company today. Maybe I will see you for a late lunch tomorrow?” Thor offered. You nodded and he kissed the back of your hand. “Until then.”

No one offered to walk you to your room, but you were somewhat confident you could get there now, so you made your goodbyes and started walking in the general direction. After a while, you realized that you were definitely lost. You thought you might be in the general vicinity, but the hallways all looked very similar and seemed to branch off in nonsensical ways.

When you ended up back at the grand hall, you sighed and closed your eyes, leaning against a wall. 

“Lost?” a low voice asked. You opened your eyes to see Loki. 

“I just wanted a stroll,” you shrugged. “But if you were to say, walk me to my room, I wouldn’t be mad.”

He chuckled at your joke and nodded, gesturing the way to start walking.

“How did you learn this castle?” you asked, skimming your hand along the wall as you walked.

“By getting lost,” he admitted. 

You smiled softly. 

“Thank you for promising to take me out tomorrow,” you said, sounding a bit sheepish. “I’m sorry you have to run an errand with me.”

“It’s my pleasure,” he said. “Maria is an old friend, it will be nice to see her.”

You tried to keep track of all the turns you were taking, but you weren’t sure you’d be able to remember them all during the five minute walk. 

“My brother seems to like you immensely,” Loki noted after a long stretch of silence. 

“Oh, well, I am enjoying everyone’s company here as well,” you said. 

“Even mine?” he asked, half-jokingly.

“You know I do,” you smirked, pushing him playfully in the arm. 

Your magic stirred at the contact like a jolt of energy. This time he did not hide his expression so well, and you were sure he felt it too. It seemed like he was about to say something, and you couldn’t risk him asking you about magic. Not now, not when you were getting closer to your goal here. 

Thankfully, you’d reached your room. 

“Thanks for walking me,” you said, sounding almost guilty. “I appreciate it.”

He still looked at you with some consideration, but said nothing more than, “Any time, princess. I’ll see you in the morning.”

He walked away with one glance back at you before you entered your room. 


	4. Fine Things Cannot Be Faked

When Leia shook you awake, you wanted to kill her. It was indeed before sunrise, as you’d made her promise, but your eyes refused to open.

“Get up!” she hit you lightly down your legs.

“Five more minutes,” you moaned. 

“Get your ass up,” Leia said, dragging you up by your arm. Finally, you opened your eyes. “Good, now get dressed.”

You did as you were told, and she just finished lacing up your coresetted dress as the knock on the door sounded.

You answered it, finding Loki waiting in a nice looking suit, perhaps to impress his friend or to wear her handiwork. Still, it was the most well-fitting thing you’d seen him in, showing off the lean contours of his body. You couldn’t help but stare. 

“Good morning, princess,” he greeted, waiting for your eyes to finish gazing over his body. 

“Morning,” you blushed, feeling caught out. “Ready?” 

“If you are,” he nodded. “Would you prefer a carriage or to walk? It’s about two miles away.”

“I would love a walk,” you smiled. “Maybe the cool air will wake me up.”

With a wave to Leia, you followed Loki out of the palace gates and onto the main streets of Asgard. As you left the castle, you realized there were two large guards following you.

“Do your friends usually accompany you as you leave the grounds?” you asked Loki.

“Yes,” he sighed. “Though I can more than take care of myself. As I said, father does protect me, even when it is not necessary.”

As if to prove him wrong, you passed a scene similar to one of the last you’d seen in your kingdom.

DEATH TO MAGES

The writing seemed to be smeared on in black paint across a large open wall. No one seemed to be making any moves to clean it up. You halted, affected by the tightness it caused in your chest. Loki hadn’t noticed it, but noticed your absence by his side soon enough, and turned to see what was the matter.

“Ah,” he said quietly as he stood beside you. 

“I just don’t understand the hatred,” you said, your voice tight. “They don't even know--”

You stopped yourself from saying “us” and instead substituted, “Who they’re hating. They’ve just been taught to fear.”

“A few bad apples spoil the bunch,” Loki mused. “You believe that people like me aren’t dangerous?” he asked. There was a devilish twinkle in his eye, but you could tell he also required a response. 

“Any tool wielded by the wrong person can be dangerous,” you said. “You shouldn’t be punished because you were born as  _ potentially _ violent. You could also be potentially altruistic.”

“You feel passionately about this,” he noted.

“I do,” you said, though you did not confide why. “Don’t you feel unsafe around these people? They must hate you. I don’t understand why they hate you, but tolerate Thor. I realize that he does not possess magic as you do, but he still uses it in his way.”

“Being in the spotlight presents a multitude of ways for us and society to be hypocritical,” Loki smiled sadly.

“I suppose representation matters,” you said. “If he’s accepted, perhaps other well-known people could come out as mages and support them, help guide others to accepting them.”

“It would be a start, I suppose,” Loki said knowingly. “Know anyone like that?”

The way he said it made your magic perk up. Did he suspect? You hadn’t had any outbursts, so you weren’t sure how he would. Still, no one knew who you were in this kingdom, you’d hold no sway over these people. Perhaps if you married Thor, that would change. Perhaps that would be your work.

“No, I don’t know anyone like that,” you said, somewhat convincingly. 

He nodded absently. You were still staring at the death threat on the wall. 

“Come,” he said. “Away from this ugliness.”

He took your hand in his and lead you away. The energy flowed between your combined hands, but you tried to ignore it. It must be in your mind, you must just be nervous around him for some reason. He dropped your hand when you entered a small corner shop at the end of a busy street. Despite the foot traffic around the store, it was nearly empty, with only one customer being helped.

“Prince Loki,” the young male worker said, flustered.

“Maria, please,” Loki ordered. 

“Of course, your majesty,” the man bowed and hurried into a back room. 

Loki’s presence was interesting to watch. No one seemed to want to make eye contact with him, and the man who had just fled the room had shaken like a leaf. Was he truly that terrifying to people? Was it the magic? Or was it the dark eyes, the confident stare?

A woman dressed in the finest robes you’d ever seen emerged from the back room with a huge smile on her face. 

“I knew you’d be back, baby,” she said warmly. 

She had a grandmotherly quality about her, but she also oozed style and class.

“I see you finally brought a fiance to me?” she asked. “About damn time you got married. Start giving me little dark-haired babies.” She smiled warmly at you, and you blushed. 

“No, Maria,” Loki laughed. Was that a small blush on his cheeks as well? “This is one of my brother’s potential… wives,” he managed. “And we would like to purchase a ballgown for her. Perhaps one of your own design?”

“You mean the ball next week?” she asked incredulously. 

“Yes, ma’am,” Loki nodded. She eyed him carefully and then took your hands in hers.

“Let me look at you,” she said. She led you forward a few feet and twirled you around. She looked at every curve and line of your body. 

“Such a tight deadline’s gonna cost you, boy,” she warned. 

“I’m fully aware,” he promised. 

“Oh no, don’t spend so much on my account,” you pressed. “I’ll be fine in one my old dresses.”

“Nonsense,” Loki said. “It’s no expense at all.”

“Not to you, maybe,” Maria muttered. “Darling, it would be my honor to design for you.”

“Thank you,” you responded.

“My man will take your measurements,” she said, pointing to her assistant that had found her for you. He took you over to stand in front of a mirror and took the measuring tape off from around his neck to start taking measurements. As he did, you saw Maria take Loki aside. They thought you could not hear them, but you listened hard. 

“Thor’s going to marry that woman?” she asked. 

“It seems that way,” Loki sighed. 

She paused a moment, and in the mirror you could see her assessing his features. 

“Why do you look like you’ll be going to a funeral rather than a wedding?” she asked. “Something wrong with her?” 

“Absolutely nothing,” Loki answered.

She seemed to understand this answer in a way you did not, and patted him on the shoulder as if consoling him. You saw that the man was done taking your measurements, so you thanked him and headed back over to Loki.

“That was easy,” you smiled, trying the lessen the sadness that now creased his features. “Are you alright?” you asked. 

With surprising ease, he resumed a happier composure and nodded. 

“Perhaps you would like to get some breakfast?” he asked. 

“Please,” you said excitedly. “Thank you again for such a rush order,” you said to Maria. 

“Anything for my boy,” she nodded with a wink at Loki. 

As you made your way down to a small cafe, you decided to ask Loki about Maria. 

“She seems like a sort of grandmother to you,” you smiled. “I’ve never seen anyone address you like that.”

“We’ve helped each other out over the years,” he answered. “When I was younger, I wanted to run away more often than not. Often I ran here. I like fine things, I like how certain lines and certain textures can take a man from looking one way to another.”

“Who’d have thought someone with magic would need physical things to change their appearance,” you mused.

“It’s like any fine thing in life, it can’t be faked. You could listen to someone read to you from a book of course, but it’s another thing to touch it, to feel the pages, the history. It’s the same for me with fabrics. You can feel the love that Maria puts into every stitch, the thought that goes into every seam. I couldn’t fake that with my magic. Not as well as I’d like anyway.”

“How old fashioned,” you teased.

You ordered your breakfast and received it in record time, no doubt slowing down the rest of the patron’s mornings to accommodate you. You didn’t go out this much in your kingdom for obvious concealment reasons, but with Loki you felt more confident. Here amongst these people you didn’t fear an outbreak. His confidence seemed to flow into you somehow. It was nice, not worrying about it for a while. 

After you’d finished, you walked back to the palace together. You longed for him to hold your hand as he had to lead you away from that awful sign, but he didn’t of course. You usually didn’t crave contact with others, but he was different. You wanted that spark again, even if it was only your imagination.

Thor met you upon your arrival back at the palace and promised you a hearty lunch. You’d taken your time walking back, and were hungry again despite your late breakfast, so you gladly followed him into one of the smaller dining rooms. While it was not the grand hall, the vastness of the room still seemed unnecessary to you. You sat and allowed the lunch to be served to you, sitting across from a smiling Thor. 

“How was Maria’s?” Thor asked. 

“Good,” you smiled. “She seems like a miracle worker. I don’t know how she’ll get it done.”

“She’ll get it done,” he promised. “She’d do anything for Loki.”

“It seems mutual,” you noted. 

Thor nodded. 

“My brother does not take to many people, but when he does, it is a strong hold. You and Maria should count yourselves lucky.”

You blinked, unsure you’d heard that correctly. There was no way you were on the same tier as Maria in Loki’s eyes, but the fact that Thor thought it at all possible was interesting. Perhaps that meant he would favor you as a future wife. It seemed this was something that Loki had not done with Thor’s previous companions. 

“We passed troubling vandalism on the way in,” you frowned. “Death to mages,” you repeated what you’d read. 

Thor didn’t seemed as troubled as he perhaps should have at this news. 

“Some villagers do not understand magic,” he sighed. “They fear it.”

“But you and your brother openly use it,” you said. “Couldn’t you show them it is nothing to fear? Even from their fellow man?”

“They trust me, as you’ve noticed because of my hammer’s specific restrictions, but they’ve never trusted Loki. He does not express himself well to them, he is not well-liked in the public. He has a reputation of being a trickster.”

You nodded, taking in this piece of information. You could see how Loki could be perceived that way. His eyes were sharp and calculating, his face was often a stone mask. Magic needed a sort of public relations manager, someone to show them that Loki’s persona wasn’t just what magic could be. While that wasn’t going to be you, you wondered if it were at all possible. 

“We have similar distrust in my kingdom,” you said. “I’ve always thought there should be some kind of action taken.”

“These things usually work themselves out,” Thor shook his head. “I believe people are generally good and understanding.”

You sighed, realizing this was exactly the reaction Loki had predicted he would have on your first night here. You envied Thor’s optimism and dreaded your realism. Still, you weren’t about to tell this future king he was wrong and risk everything you’d come here for. You’d speak your mind when you had a place in the throne room, you decided, and not before.

“You’re probably right,” you muttered, unhappy to be so dishonest with him and yourself. Changing the subject you asked, “So how was your morning?”

“I was training with my warriors,” he smiled proudly. 

“A good session?”

“Very,” he said. 

He went on to talk about the drills they’d performed, and the sparring practices. It was sort of interesting at first, but was a little too violent for your taste. You preferred your violence to remain fictional, rather than spoil the real world.

Just as Thor was about to launch into another story, you saw his gaze flicker behind you. Turning, you saw Odin had entered the room. 

“Just the lady I was looking for,” he smiled at you. “Will you walk with me for a moment?” he asked. 

You’d finished your meal moments ago, and so nodded, getting up and walking swiftly to him. 

“I hope you don’t mind me stealing her for a quick walk?” Odin asked his son. 

“Not at all, Father,” he smiled at you. “Have fun.”

Odin offered you his arm, and you took it as he lead you out onto a stretch of balcony that overlooked an impressive mountain range.

“How are you settling in, my dear?” he asked. 

His voice, while authoritative and deep, had a soothing quality around the edges. It rasped with what must have been centuries of orating.

“Just fine, thank you,” you smiled politely. 

“But really,” he asked. There was a knowing look in his eyes. He didn’t care for simple niceties. 

“Really, well,” you promised with a surprised smile. “Your kingdom is beautiful, your sons are very welcoming. Everything has been great.”

“Good,” he nodded. “I hope you will be the one my son will choose. He has rejected all others before you, though some seemed just as beautiful and amiable as yourself.”

“Oh,” you said. 

“Surprised?” he asked. 

“A little,” you admitted. “I always thought the same things of the girls, and so supposed you were the one to disapprove of them for some unknown reason.”

“As long as she is of royal birth, and my son is happy, I do not care who she is,” Odin stated. “He seems to like you far better than the others so far.”

Well, that was good to know anyway. 

“I hope you become my daughter,” Odin said suddenly. 

This both shocked and pleased you. You’d not spoken much to Odin, but you were sure that he had heard about you at length from his sons, even in such a short time.

“Thank you, me too,” you said automatically. You weren’t sure this were true, but that was why you were here, wasn’t it? It seemed the right thing to say. You walked for a ways more in silence, taking in the beautiful scenery.

“I suppose I should return you to my son,” he said softly. 

He did as he promised and you found Thor still at the table, munching happily on whatever was left from your lunch. Odin left you, but Thor informed you that his afternoon was regrettably not free. 

“I can walk you to the library if you’d like,” he offered. “But I am afraid I must return to my soldiers, it’s one of our more intense training days.”

“That sounds fine,” you promised. 

And it was. You spent quite a few hours in the library, and found something quite useful: a map of the castle. You spent a good deal of time studying it, memorizing it. In your head you could picture it clearly when you closed your eyes. It was easier to learn from the bird’s eye view allotted by the map, and suddenly those random hallways didn’t seem so random. All of the rooms had sigils on their doors to identify them, and it was easy enough to find the one on yours and correlate it to the map. Now at least you’d be able to get around without a guide.

With confidence finally in your step, you walked back from the library and spent the rest of the day reading by the fireplace in your room.


	5. A Dress and a Dance

You’d been lounging with Leia into the late morning, as no one had called on you, and she’d brought a huge breakfast to the room. A loud knock followed by Leia’s insistence that they come in, showed Thor to be the greeter.

“Good morning, princess,” he smiled. “I was wondering if you would perhaps join me on a horseback riding adventure.”

“I would love to,” you said, and jumped up and walked to him.

“Lovely,” he answered. “Are you ready now, or should I come back?”

“Let me just throw on some riding clothes and I’ll be right out,” you promised. 

He nodded and left you to change into tight fitting pants and a shirt and vest. You braided your hair out of your face and got the thumbs up from Leia that it looked good.

Finding him outside your door, you followed him to the stables. The horses were the finest you had seen, unsurprisingly, and it didn’t take you long to find your favorite. She was the darkest black you’d ever seen with bright intelligent eyes. 

“Her name is Firestorm,” Thor informed you. 

He mounted a white and gray steed and waited for you patiently. You mounted your horse as well and followed him out to the path.

You rode together in silence, sometimes racing, sometimes just admiring the scenery. It was easy to be with him. You didn’t have to think, other than to keep your magic in check, you could just be yourself, knowing he’d accept you. After so little time with someone, you found this remarkable. He would truly make a good king someday, you realized, if he had a little more guidance. Perhaps you could give that to him.

Still, you watched him with the fondness of a friend, not a lover. It troubled you that you might not be able to force yourself to explore that side of a relationship with him. It would undoubtedly be required of you, should you stay, and it made your stomach churn. Although a familiar expression, the fact that you saw him as a brother was not untrue. You wondered how he saw you, but dared not ask.

You returned the horses to their stables after a few hours, and saw how gently Thor treated the animals. 

“You love them?” you asked, looking at the affectionate steed. 

“Very much,” he smiled. “All animals. I love their innocence and instinct.”

“Me too,” you smiled, petting the nose of your horse softly.

When you made it back to the castle, you ran into Loki. 

“I was looking for you,” he said. Why did your heart beat just a little faster at that? You wondered. 

“What for?” you asked. 

“Maria has sent word that we can pick up your dress, and a surprise for me as well tomorrow.”

“Wow, that was fast,” you noted. 

“That was expensive,” he smirked. You blushed, feeling more spoiled than you had a right to feel.

“You will look wonderful, I am sure,” Thor smiled at you. “And Loki will probably outshine us both, ha!” he hit his brother playfully in the arm, causing Loki to flinch.

“Yes, well, we’ll see about that,” Loki said with a glance at you before heading off in another direction. 

Thor left as well to attend to some of his matters, and you found yourself reading in your room before long. Leia was missing from the room until about an hour after you got settled in.

“Where’ve you been?” you asked.

“Making trouble,” she teased. 

“I’m sure,” you smiled. “Really though.”

“Really, I wasn’t doing much, just ran some laundry and explored a little.”

“You’re still happy here?” you checked. 

“Enormously,” she promised. “Any progress with Thor?”

You sighed, feeling the need to confide what had been running through your head. 

“I think he’s lovely,” you started. 

“But,” she guessed. 

“But… I don’t see him as a husband, a lover.”

She frowned. 

“Could you grow to?”

“I don’t think so,” you shrugged. 

“What does he think of you?” she asked. 

“I have no idea,” you answered. “He does tell me I’m beautiful a lot.”

“He must be blind,” she smirked.    
“Must be,” you rolled your eyes. 

“Doesn’t it… doesn’t it feel like we’re somehow  _ meant _ to be here though?” Leia asked, the mirth leaving her eyes for a more serious gaze. You swallowed hard. You’d felt the same but hadn’t said anything.    
“I’ve had similar thoughts myself,” you admitted. “Like we’re in the right area, but not the exact right  _ spot _ … or… something,” you sighed.

She nodded, equally confused and unsure. 

“Well, we’ve not been here long, perhaps after the ball we’ll feel better. You still have almost a whole month to decide.”

You nodded, taking comfort in even the limited time frame.

The following morning Loki came to take you to Maria’s.

“Carriage or walk?” he asked. 

“Walk,” you decided. “If you’re up for it.”

“Always,” he smiled. 

Once again the guards followed you at a comfortable distance, but it made you feel on edge regardless. 

“What do you think your surprise is?” you asked. 

Loki considered this for a moment. 

“I’m not sure,” he admitted. “Probably a handkerchief for my suit, something small.”

“It was nice of her to throw something special in for you,” you said. “I would have been dead tired after making any dress in that time.”

“She has quite the army to aid her,” he assured you. 

Only a vague shadow of what had once marred the wall remained of the hateful vandalism you’d seen the other day. Thankfully, no new ones had sprung up either and you made it to Maria’s unaffected.

When you entered, Maria was holding a huge gown in her hands. 

“Come come,” she said. “I will not let you see this on a hanger, you must see it on you.” Then she turned to Loki. “Renaldo will show you your surprise.”

You blinked, not expecting a fashion show right now, but allowed yourself to be dragged into the back room. Your somewhat apprehensive expression must have been humorous, as Loki laughed when you glanced back at him. Maria took you into a small changing room and laid the dress on a bench. 

“Undress,” she ordered.

You weren’t about to argue with the authority in her voice. You also just wanted to try the dress on. Up close you could see intricate work had been done to embellish it. You stripped down to your undergarments, and she helped you into the dress. The room was too small to allow a full length mirror, so she walked you out into the main room, back to where Loki was. Expecting to find him in the clothes you’d left him in, you were surprised to see that he was now dressed in an elegant dark green, almost black, suit with a black tie. 

When he saw you, however, it was as though time had stopped. He seemed frozen, staring at you in this dress. 

“Is it nice looking?” you asked sheepishly, making your way over to the mirror on the other side of the room. 

Seeing your reflection, you felt a similar rush of awe. The corseted bodice fit your curves perfectly. The skirt of the dress billowed out like a dream, and you twirled happily around. The embellishments made it look as though the gown sparkled with stars.

“You look…” he whispered.   
“And you,” you smiled, turning around. “Hardly a small surprise,” you laughed. 

It occurred to you then that your dress matched Loki’s suit perfectly. Was this an all green ball, you wondered? Or would it be strange to not match your potential betrothed? You didn’t ask, as you didn’t want Maria to think you wanted anything changed about it.

“It’s a dream,” you said to her. 

“It was lucky for you I had a base dress in your size,” she smirked. “The fitting and embellishing was the real work. It may be my best.”

“You’ve outdone yourself yet again,” Loki said, managing to regain his composure. “She looks…”

“Stunning,” Maria finished for him. “If this doesn’t make the whole kingdom desire your hand in marriage, I’ll retire.”

You chuckled and took Maria’s hand to follow her back to the changing room. Once the dress was on the hanger, you took Maria’s hand.    
“Thank you so much,” you said. “I’m so nervous about this ball, but I know I’ll feel more confident in the dress. I don’t know how I can repay you.”

“Well, your royal friends are doing that,” she promised. “But  _ you _ can repay me by falling in love in that dress.”

You smiled softly, glad to have made a friend in this woman. 

“I’m sure this won’t be the last we see of each other,” you said to her, as you rejoined Loki in the front room.

“I am sure of it,” she nodded with a knowing look to Loki that you did not understand. 

The garments were handed to your guards for carrying back to the castle. You could have gotten the garments delivered, you were sure, but you thought Loki might enjoy coming here, away from the castle, as he’d made no such delivery arrangement.

Walking back, a thought occurred to you that you were unsure why you hadn’t thought of before.    
“It’s been a long time since I danced,” you said, almost to yourself. “I’ll probably step on a lot of toes… Maybe no one will look at me.”

Loki chuckled and cast a side glance at you. 

“Darling, you’re the potential betrothed to their beloved future king, of course they will look at you.”

Your wide-eyed stare made him laugh and you pushed him playfully in the arm. 

“Stop it,” you warned. “I could really mess this up.”   
“I doubt it,” he smiled softly. 

“Will you help me?” you asked. 

“What?” he responded. 

“Just give me a quick refresher course. I’m sure there’s some dances native to your kingdom I should learn anyway.”

He looked nervous, an expression that did not seem at home on his features. 

“I don’t think that would be a good idea,” he said. 

You’d arrived at the castle and were standing near the entrance gates. He took an almost imperceptible step backwards.

“Why not?” you asked. 

His mind seemed at war for a moment, but at the end of it he sighed and shook his head. 

“Alright,” he agreed. 

“Well don’t seem so happy about it,” you teased at his defeated answer.

“I apologize, princess, it’s just… Nothing. Nevermind. Should we start the lessons now?”

He seemed almost sad, but you weren’t sure why. Perhaps it was actually boredom, that he didn’t want to have to teach you.

The guards dropped your dress in your room for you, and took Loki’s with them presumably to drop in his quarters, leaving the two of you alone in the room. Leia was gone for the afternoon, apparently, which you were thankful for. You didn’t need her judging your poor skills. 

“I’m afraid we have no music,” you lamented.    
“That's alright,” he promised.

The air had changed between you since the bedroom door had closed. You felt nervous, almost jumpy. He stood with an outstretched hand, waiting.

“Let’s start with the most common,” he said, naming a dance you vaguely remembered. 

You took his hand in yours, feeling the spark between you. Your magic had almost gotten used to it now, like an old friend knocking on the door. Your other hand ghosted the back of his neck. He slid his free arm around your waist, pulling you close to him. You found your breath catch in your throat when you registered how close he was to you.

He began humming softly. Not any tune you could name, but one that gave you the right rhythm for the moves. You watched your feet at first, careful not to step on his toes.

“Eyes up, princess,” he ordered gently.

You looked up and immediately stepped on his foot. 

“Sorry,” you bit your lip. 

“That’s alright,” he said patiently. “Just try to follow my body, feel the direction we’ll turn and allow your feet to follow.”

You relaxed slightly and did as he asked, trying to let go a little and let things naturally move as they would. You found this good advice as you didn’t step on his toes, and instead focused on his face. As you relaxed, your body moved closer to his, your chest brushing up against his, your grip around the back of his neck tightening. His hand held yours tightly now, and you found you couldn’t look away from his gaze if you tried. There was something there, something quite intense. Focus, perhaps.

You could feel your magic humming with the prolonged contact with him. It felt as if you were charging up for something, as if building static electricity that would then send out a shock. Unlike other events where you felt your magic building towards an outburst, this was different. It didn’t feel dangerous or uncontrollable. Somehow it felt powerful and contained.

He hummed a while longer until you’d gotten the steps down, and stopped, ending the dance. You both remained still for a moment, that intensity in his eyes somehow increasing. You thought he might say something. His breath on your cheek was warm, you could have tilted your head forward to rest your forehead against his but you didn’t. Your magic still hummed, crescendoing now, and you were unsure what it would build to and why you were being so reckless about it. He blinked, and immediately pulled away from you and rubbed the corners of his mouth with his fingers.

“Right, good,” he said, barely looking at you. “I think that should suffice.”

And just like that, the building of your energy was gone. You felt a little drained, but realized that the practical side of this exercise was limited at best.   
“That was just one dance,” you argued. “Do you think we could do maybe one more?”

“I’m sorry,” he said hastily, heading for the door. “That’s all I have time for today.”

Perhaps that was for the best, you realized. Perhaps you should try to figure out what happened with your magic instead of indulging in his touch again.

“Alright,” you said softly. Your voice sounded a little pathetic, and you cringed at it.

“I’ll see you later,” he said, before leaving the door without even a glance back at you.

You still felt his touch around you, and while more dormant than before, your magic tingled. What was it between you two? Could you trust him to ask?   
No. Your mother had made you promise never to tell anyone. She had not made any exceptions, and with good reason.


	6. Cross My Heart

The dress was even more beautiful than you remembered. The deep emerald tones contrasted with gold linings and ivory accents to create a truly stunning work of art. Leia had just finished your hair and makeup, and for the first time in possibly forever, you found yourself staring in the mirror. 

“Alright, Narcissus,” Leia teased, pulling your attention away from the mirror. 

“Sorry,” you laughed. “I’ve never felt this beautiful before.”

“Yeah, well, you’d be right. This is definitely the hottest you’ve ever looked. If Thor doesn’t go for this, he won’t go for anything.”

You smiled, but didn’t laugh. You’d almost forgotten about Thor. With the anxiety of basically being introduced to their entire family and royal friends, you’d forgotten the actual goal.

“I am not looking forward to meeting everyone,” you admitted. 

“Why?” she asked. “You’ll be fine. Thor will do most of the talking. Men always do if you let them.”

She rolled her eyes and made a face. 

“I suppose,” you nodded. “I want to make a good impression of course, but I’ve never been any good with crowds.”

“Mmm,” she agreed, knowing your history of reclusion. “Well, it’s just one night. Woo everyone and then get that ring on your finger. Once you’re in, you’re in.”

You nodded again and took a deep breath, calming your magic. A knock on the door startled you, and you turned, calling the knocker inside. Thor entered, and immediately dropped his jaw. 

“M’lady,” he breathed. “You look…”

Leia chuckled at his speechlessness, and pushed you towards him. You took his hands in yours.

“I’ll take that as a compliment,” you laughed when he didn’t finish his sentence. This seemed to rouse him from his stupor, and he chuckled himself.

“I should have known you would be the most stunning woman at the ball,” he smiled. “But seeing it is another story.”

You took his arm and took one more look at Leia who gave you a thumbs up before you headed out to the ball. You expected to enter through the main doors to the ballroom. You’d passed it many times, though you hadn’t been inside. Instead, Thor led you around to a set of stairs. You ascended together, talking amiably, and arrived at two large doors. 

“Ready?” he asked.

You weren’t sure why he asked this, it didn’t even feel like you were going to be entering the ballroom. You nodded, and as the doors opened, you realized why he had asked. He’d brought you around to the opposite entrance, one that opened up to a balcony with two giant staircases leading off either side. The minute the doors opened, everyone in the crowded hall turned their attention to you.

You almost forgot to breathe as Thor led you to the edge of the balcony and you saw how many people were below you. It seemed like a dream where you’d gone somewhere without shoes, or were supposed to recite a poem but forgotten to prepare.

“Ladies and gentlemen,” Thor’s voice boomed, pulling a few strangler’s attentions to him. “Let me introduce my honored guest this evening.” He gestured to you as he said your name, and the people applauded. “Please honor her with your finest dancing and your merriest stories.”

The people clapped and Thor led you down the staircase to your right. As you descended, one face in the crowd stood out. Loki. He was staring at you quite openly, but differently than his brother had done. He seemed to notice every detail of you, studying as if his life depended on it.

Odin was the first to receive you, and he and Frigga told you how beautiful you looked. You returned the compliments, and allowed Thor to lead you around the room. While not everyone’s attentions were still focused on you, many had made a sort of line to greet you.

Loki remained away from this line at first, and you greeted many people who you almost immediately forgot as soon as they left. Leia was right, you let Thor do the talking, and he was glad to.

You spotted the buffet tables on the far side of the ballroom, along with the drinks.

“Do you mind if I go grab us some drinks?” you asked Thor, as he was finishing up talking to one of his aunts.

“Of course, darling, lovely thought.”

You curtseyed slightly and made your way hastily across the room to the drinks. You poured yourself one and allowed yourself a moment before heading back to him. You were about to grab your drinks and go when a woman stopped you. Her face was quite beautiful, though severe. Her long hair was braided and fell nearly to her waist. She was dressed in a gown, though with her muscles and stance, you could tell she was one of Thor’s soldiers.

“Hello,” you greeted, intimidated by her stare. She didn't respond at first, eying you carefully and critically. “I’m--”   
“I know who you are,” she spat. 

“I’m sorry did I do something to--”

She pressed her lips in a firm line and seemed to think of something that calmed her. She took a breath before she spoke.    
“No, I apologize, princess,” she said, curtseying awkwardly. 

“I thought you’d gotten lost,” Thor bellowed, making his way over to you. 

You watched the woman’s face as he made his entrance, and saw it soften. Her hard eyes flickered with affection, and her cheeks faintly blushed. 

“I see you have met my Sif,” he said. 

“Sort of,” you muttered. 

“She’s my best warrior,” he announced. 

“I don’t doubt it,” you nodded. 

“You look great,” Sif said to Thor. “I mean, you both do,” she said, clearing her throat. 

“You look… stunning,” Thor said, and for the first time, you heard a different timbre to his voice. 

It wasn’t like when he had spoken to you of your beauty, it was more tender than that. You blinked, realizing in a moment what you’d wondered about for a while now. Why had you been summoned here? Why hadn’t Thor taken another wife, why had he rejected so many women? He was in love, you realized. With her. And she with him. It wasn’t hard to tell. In fact, it was nearly impossible to miss. Odin must not have allowed him a marriage with someone not of royal birth. Your heart hurt for them.

“Why don’t you take the first dance with her?” you offered with a sly smile. 

Thor seemed tempted, even taking a small step towards her, but he stopped himself. 

“This is your night, m’lady, we must dance.”

“Alright, well the second, and maybe a few after that if you want to keep feeling in your toes,” you smirked. You shared a moment with Sif then that seemed to matter. She nodded only slightly to you and you returned it.

As the band began to play, the dance floor cleared, leaving space for you and Thor to lead the dancers. You took your position, though it was harder to reach around Thor. Your body didn’t seem to fit as nicely with his as it had with Loki’s and you could already tell you weren’t going to do this very gracefully. At least his cape might hide the damage your feet would do to his while you twirled.

As the music began, you decided to broach the topic candidly.

“Lady Sif is very beautiful,” you offered. Thor glanced her way as if he couldn’t remember if that were true. 

“Aye,” he said. “I suppose.”

“You love her,” you said. 

His face dropped to an expression you had not seen before. It reminded you of the feeling you got when you thought about someone finding out about your magic. Your darkest secret revealed. 

“I… I--”   
“It’s alright,” you laughed. “Listen, I have a plan.”

He looked wary, a little concerned, but he listened. You hadn’t had much time to formulate this plan, but it seemed pretty straightforward.

“I love you,” you promised, “But I do not believe I could fall in love with you.”

“I feel the same,” he smiled softly. “We are old friends already.”

“Yes,” you nodded. “But if we were to marry, it would alleviate a lot of pressure in my kingdom. I could advocate for social change with newfound authority, try to make things better. And you, you could be with Sif. Not officially, of course, but you wouldn’t have to keep doing this. You could be with her, I wouldn’t care.”

Thor nearly laughed with relief. 

“I see that as a very enticing offer,” he smiled. “Though… I would not want to do that to her. We would always be a secret. Never truly happy.”

“I know,” you frowned. “Just think about it,” you offered.

“You know you are very perceptive,” he said. “Much like my brother.”   
“Loki knows about this too?” 

“He is the only one who figured it out. Until you.”

This seemed unfathomable to you. It had been  _ so obvious _ . But perhaps others didn’t want to see it.

“Have you asked your father?” you asked. 

“No,” Thor scoffed. “He would disown me for even asking.”

“Are you sure?” you asked. 

He sighed deeply and nodded. 

“Sure enough not to ask.”

“Mm, well we have a little while at least,” you noted. “We have some time to think.”

He looked at you with immense kindness in his eyes.

“What you offer is quite selfless,” he noted. You scoffed.   
“Hardly. I’m not walking away empty handed.”

“But your goals are also selfless. Peace in your kingdom. Hardly for your benefit.”

He was half right there. Of course you didn’t want your subjects killed for being themselves, but nor did you personally want to fear for your life.

“Well, if you say so,” you smiled. The music ended and you clapped for the musicians. “Now I believe it is your turn to dance with Sif.”

You saw her waiting expectantly at the edge of the circle of onlookers, and you and Thor walked over to her. As soon as they were off, you saw a clear path to the door that led to one of the outdoor balconies. Glancing around and seeing no one was watching, you made for the door, slipping outside and into the cool night air. You rested your back against the wall, happy to have a moment to yourself.

“Needed some air?” a low voice asked. 

You jumped and saw that Loki was a ways down the wall in a similar position. You laughed and walked over to him. 

“I don’t do well in crowds,” you shrugged. “Too many people. I needed to recharge.”

“They’ll notice your absence soon,” he warned, though he was smiling. 

“They’ll survive,” you sighed. “Also, I hear we’re in on a secret together.” Loki arched an eyebrow waiting for you to elaborate. “Thor and Sif?” you asked. He smirked. 

“Yes,” he nodded. “They’ve had eyes for each other for quite some time now. My brother has sent all the other candidates away fairly quickly but we both liked you, didn’t want you to leave so soon.”

“That’s sweet,” you said. “I offered to marry him and let him be with her, but he didn’t want to keep her a secret. I get it,” you said. “I was just trying to make the most out of a bad situation.”   
“Logical,” Loki nodded. 

“It’s mostly for me, honestly, though he believes my motives to be selfless. If I could just get Asgard on board with magic, I’m sure the other smaller kingdoms would follow as they have with countless other matters.”   
“You really care about this magic issue,” he said, his eyes calculating something. 

“Of course,” you answered.

“Why?”

“I’ve told you why,” you frowned. 

“I don’t believe you,” he said.

He put a hand on your lower back and pulled you close to him. 

“Do you feel that?” he asked. 

You were going to feign ignorance, pretend like your magic hadn’t been awakened the second you walked out onto this balcony with him, but you couldn’t, so you said nothing.

“You do,” he smirked. “Show me,” he beckoned.

“I… I don’t know what you’re talking about,” you stammered, trying and failing to look away from him. 

His eyes seemed to be glowing. He  _ knew _ already, he must. Or was he just teasing you? You couldn’t risk admitting it if that was even a slight possibility.

“Princess,” he said softly, leaning in. His lips hovered just above yours, ghosting along your lips. “You can trust me.”

Your eyes fluttered closed and you were helpless when he kissed you. Your magic howled, expelling energy from your body in a wave that blew back the leaves on the trees, changing them from a dark green to a dark purple. Wind whipped around you and sparks of magic flew from your hands. You had pulled away as soon as your magic had been released, and you closed your eyes, praying to be anywhere but here. Soon, in the still night air, you felt a tender finger under your chin. 

“Princess,” he said. “Open your eyes.”

You did as he asked and saw the kindest smile on his features. While he usually smirked or frowned, the genuine smile did not seem out of place, just rare.

“I knew it,” he said proudly. “But why didn’t you tell me? You knew I had magic too.”

You sighed, taking both of his hands in yours. 

“It is a long story,” you said. You looked towards the doors of the ballroom you were sure you were being missed from. “One for another night, if you’ll allow it?”

He nodded and pulled you into a hug. You let yourself be held, burying your face into his chest and letting his scent surround you. For the first time in a long time you felt safe. 

“You won’t tell anyone?” you asked. “Not even Thor?”

“Cross my heart,” Loki said seriously. 

You felt immensely relieved, though you had hardly had time to process what had just happened. 

“Thank you,” you said. “I think you’re right, I think I will have been missed. I should go.”

You turned and walked towards the door, but turned back.    
“Thank you, Loki,” you smiled.

He remained in the shadows of the castle wall, but nodded, and watched you walk back into the light.

As soon as you walked back into the ball, you were surrounded. Thor was the one to grab your hand and pull you close to him first. 

“M’lady! We thought you’d gotten lost,” he smiled. 

“I just needed some air,” you smiled politely, looking at the horde of men and women around you. 

“I wanted you to meet my warriors,” he smiled proudly. 

He introduced you to many people then, all taller and far more muscular than you were or would ever be. You nodded, but everything around you was swirling. Someone knew you had magic.  _ Loki  _ knew you had magic. You’d betrayed your mother’s wish, and yet it didn’t feel wrong. It felt… nice. You had someone you could confide in now, someone who shared your gifts and troubles. You glanced around for the prince but could hardly see into the crowd over the warriors. You thought Loki might not be in the room anyway, your magic couldn’t sense him. Listening to a few war stories, you soon tired of them. Dancing didn’t seem that enticing either though, so you nodded your head and continued to do as Leia had suggested, you let the others talk. 

When it was late enough that others had started retiring to their rooms, you made your excuses as well. 

“It’s been a long night,” you said, and they hardly knew the truth of it. “I think I’ll retire now, if I won’t start any wars,” you teased. 

“Of course, m’lady,” Thor said. “Please, let me walk you to your room.”

You consented and Thor took your arm to guide you out of the ballroom. Leaving the room, you took a deep breath. It was over, you could rest.

“I wanted to tell you again how thankful I am that you’re here,” Thor said quietly. “Your offer was very kind, and I wish to think on it some more if you’ll allow it.”   
“Take all the time you need,” you offered. “And consider talking to your parents about it. They might not be as set in their ways as you think. Particularly your mother.”

He smiled sadly and looked away. 

“Perhaps,” he allowed. “I dare not hope.”   
“Goodnight, Thor,” you said, kissing his cheek. “Thank you for tonight.”

“Goodnight, princess,” he smiled. 

You slipped into your room and found Leia reading on your bed. 

“How was it?” she asked. 

“I’m exhausted,” you said. 

“Something happened,” she said, sitting up on the bed, alert.

The downside to growing up with your handmaid was that she could read you better than you could read yourself. You hoped she would buy the arguably less exciting news than your secret as to what had changed your expression. 

“I have discovered that Thor is in love with one of his warriors. Sif,” you explained. 

She gasped and asked you to tell her everything. You did, trying to make it as interesting as possible so she would think that that was your only tale of the night. Thankfully, she did.

“If you don’t mind, I’m about ready to pass out,” you yawned. 

“I get the hint,” she said, rolling off the bed and wishing you a goodnight from the threshold to her quarters. 

When you were alone with your thoughts, they exhausted you. There were so many things to think about, and re-think. Your mind eventually gave up and you passed out.


	7. “All great and precious things are lonely.”

When you woke, it took a few minutes to discern whether last night had been a dream or not. When you decided it had been real, that Loki did know your secret, you felt strangely peaceful. Someone knew. Finally. Did you trust him with your secret? Should you? He would have no motive to use it against you for now anyway, but should you wrong him in some way, you wondered if he would betray you.

You hadn’t known him for long and his reputation for mischief and lies had been well known to you. Still, when you were with him, you didn’t feel that reputation matched the man. Mischievous, perhaps, in his sense of humor maybe, but nothing with malintent. And that kiss… There was something about the way your magic responded to him. You remembered confessing to Leia that you felt like you were meant to be here, but just weren’t quite in the right place. Perhaps it wasn’t Thor you were meant for after all. You blushed at the thought, trying to push it aside. You couldn’t though, as you ran your fingers over your lips, remembering the kiss. There was something there, you thought. Maybe. It was worth exploring anyway, you thought.

Before you could get up to start your morning routine, a knock sounded on your door. 

“Come in,” you called. 

A servant poked her head in, holding what looked like a letter. 

“Message for you, m’lady,” she said. 

“Can you bring it to me please?” you asked, not wanting to get out of bed just yet. 

She nodded and brought you the message. At the same time Leia came out of her chambers and joined you on the bed. 

“What’s this?” Leia asked, looking over your shoulder.

The deliverer eyed Leia wearily, no doubt never having seen a servant behave in such a way.

“Thank you,” you dismissed the girl. She exited the room. 

Turning the letter over, you saw that it was from Thor. You opened it and read its contents out loud to Leia.

“Princess,” you started. “I have been called away with my warriors to attend to some matters at one of our borders. I pray you will have fun in my absence. I shouldn’t be gone longer than a week. In that time I will think on what we discussed, and I thank you again for your kindness. I will miss you, dear friend, and hope you find some company in my brother.”

He didn’t know how right he was. Your first mission today was to find Loki and discuss what had transpired last night. Thor’s absence did make the palace seem a little darker, and you hoped he wouldn’t run into any serious trouble.

“Gone for a week?” Leia shrieked. “Some host.”

“He has a job,” you laughed. “Besides, I’m hardly wooing him anymore.”

“Do you think he’ll take your offer?” she asked. You’d told her of the offer when you described the events surrounding Sif last night. 

“I don’t know,” you shrugged. “I think he is an honorable man, and it doesn’t seem an honorable thing to do, even if it is the most romantic.”

“It’s a pickle,” she frowned. “Well, I think worst case we’ll be invited back here a ton and I can occasionally live in luxury.”

“You’re so selfless,” you chuckled. 

Getting dressed and eating quickly, you ventured off to find Loki. You didn’t have to look farther than the library, where you found him not reading, but simply staring at a fireplace. 

“Morning,” you greeted. Looking at him felt different now. You felt strangely nervous, giddy even.

“I thought you might come looking for me,” he returned. “Should we take a walk?”

You exited the library and started walking around the grounds. There was silence between you at first. You mulled over what you wanted to say. While this wasn’t the most romantic thing to start testing the waters with, it was honest, and if you were going to see if this might work, it would be a good test.

“I told you last night that I had a story for another time,” you said, finally breaking the silence. 

“You did indeed,” he answered. 

It was easier to talk this way, you decided. He wasn’t staring at you across a table, you could both look ahead. It was easier to be honest this way, to be as vulnerable as you would have to be to tell your story.

“You're not the first to know about my magic,” you said. “My mother found out when I was little. I had an outburst in her room one day. She told me about the way our world was, how I would have to hide who I was until things changed. It was hard on such a small child. You know what emotions are like when you’re that young. Anyway, I was okay for a little while, under her management teachings. Our kingdom is much smaller, as you know, and we walked around a lot together through the villages, talking to the people sometimes. But one day we were walking and I saw this man. He was… kicking his dog violently. And my mother saw it, but too late. My magic was welling up, going to explode. The dog was whimpering and I just… I let go. And then man was blasted back, slamming into a wall and passing out. And everyone turned… they hadn’t seen who’d done it. Such a big blast, they of course assumed it was my mother, the bigger of the two of us. And that’s when it happened,” you said, keeping the sobs contained while you could. “They killed her. The man was fine,” you said. “Just a broken arm, but he lived. They didn’t know that though. They thought she killed him. With magic. And so they… But I managed to keep the reason from my father. He doesn’t know about either of us. He thinks we were simply attacked by strangers for no reason.”

It was then that you lost it. You stopped walking and wrapped your arms around yourself. 

He said nothing, but guided you to his chest where he let you cry. You buried your face in him and collected yourself after a few moments. 

“I’m sorry,” you muttered, pulling away. His hands did not leave your back.

“No need to apologize,” he said solemnly. “I can’t imagine what that must have felt like.”

“It felt like my heart being ripped out of my chest,” you said. “And so I never told anyone. I could never risk it.”

“I’m sorry to have coaxed it out of you,” Loki nearly whispered. “I just needed to know I wasn’t crazy.”

“No, I’m glad you did,” you said. “I feel so much less alone.” You almost asked him why he had to kiss you to do it, but you didn’t. Part of you hoped he had just wanted to, even if another part of you knew it would have been a good way to throw you off your guard to let the magic slip out.

“Did your mother actually have magic?” he asked. 

“Yes,” you replied. “That’s how she knew what to teach me to suppress it. She never used it herself either. Things were especially tense in our kingdom when I was younger. The villagers who killed her were of course punished for killing their queen, but it made the hatred of magic worse regardless.”

Loki nodded thoughtfully. 

“Perhaps I could teach you to use it,” he suggested. You blinked, surprised by the offer. “I find it’s sort of like you’re a sponge, and magic is a constant trickle of water. Eventually you’ll fill up, and some will leak out, like the little outbursts you’re describing. But if you squeeze a little water out now and again, it’s more manageable.”

You nodded, taking in this information. Your mother had taught you nothing about the workings of magic, just that it was a dangerous thing to be born with.

“I think that would be a good idea,” you said. “But in private, if we could. I’m not ready to reveal myself to everyone just yet.”

“It is rather ostracizing,” he agreed. “It’s a good thing I enjoy my own company.”

“Well, hopefully you’ll enjoy mine now,” you smiled shyly. 

He smiled back and slipped his hand into yours before turning to continue walking. 

“Do you feel that?” he asked. “The energy between our magics?”

“Yes,” you smiled. “Is it like that with everyone?”

Loki shrugged and made a face, releasing your hand. 

“It’s different,” he said. “Magic is like different frequencies. When some come in contact with each other they mesh, others make you feel put off. Just depends on the person.”

“That makes sense,” you nodded. “So we… have a similar frequency?”

“I suppose you could say that,” he smiled. “Do you know what your aptitude is?” he asked.

“What do you mean?”

“Most mages have an aptitude for a particular kind of magic. For example, I am good with illusions. I know others who are good with plants, some with healing, others with charms.”

“I have no idea,” you laughed. “Every time I have an episode something different happens.”

“We can figure it out,” he promised. “There are some books that we may find useful.”

“In the library?” you asked hopefully. 

“No,” he chuckled. “In my room. I’ve collected them over many years, the library would not dare house them.”

“Oh,” you smiled. “Okay, yeah I’d love to do some research.”

“Good,” he nodded. “I have some other matters to tend to today, but we could meet for dinner tonight?” he asked. “Then a study session?”

“Sounds wonderful,” you smiled, perhaps too enthusiastically.

“I’ll meet you at your room around dinner,” he promised. 

You nodded and he left you to your own devices. You wandered around the gardens of the palace for some time, pacing and thinking. You hadn’t really thought of Loki as a potential love interest here, you’d been so focused on Thor. But now that you thought about it, it sort of made sense. You had a lot in common with the prince, and you got on well enough. You remembered your offer to Thor, and wondered if he would accept, and where that might put you should you go after these new feelings for his brother.

Worrying your stomach into knots, you decided to just let it be. Perhaps this was a passing crush and you’d find out he hated something you loved, or his views on certain things differed vastly from yours. Thinking about it though, those were two descriptions that matched Thor, as much as you loved him as a friend. 

You retired to your room for the rest of the afternoon until dinner when Loki found you in the middle of a book. 

“What’s that?” you asked, eying the basket in his hand. 

“I thought we might eat outside tonight,” he smiled. “It’s the double full moon, they’re just rising now.”

Was this a date? Surely not. You blushed nonetheless, and followed him outside to the waiting blanket and candles. It seemed like a date for sure now, but you kept doubting yourself. It was simply a nice night out with a view to behold. You also needed light to eat by. You tried to just relax and took a seat next to him.

Once you’d filled up your plates, you ate for a few minutes in silence, watching the two moons rise into the starry sky.

“Two moons,” you remarked. “I wonder why that is.”

“One would get lonely,” he smirked, though there was a tinge of sadness in his eyes. 

“I would,” you smiled softly. “I have,” you laughed hollowly. 

“How have you gone all this time carrying such a huge secret by yourself?” Loki asked. “It’s remarkable.”

You shook your head and sighed, staring at your fingers. 

“I don’t know,” you admitted. “You just sort of get used to it, I guess. The loneliness, the distrust.”

He nodded.

“I suppose I was lonely for a long time too,” he said. “I flaunt my magic because I can, but it hardly brings most people closer to me.”

“What do you do when you feel lonely?” you asked. 

“Get lost,” he smiled sadly. 

“Where?”

“Oh, books, the woods, the ocean. Anywhere really.”

“Sounds romantic,” you laughed. He chuckled. 

“Or naive,” he shook his head. “I always run away when I can’t handle something. I’ve never had a real reason to stay.”

“I’d have run away if it weren’t for Leia,” you admitted. “Probably lived in a cabin in the woods alone forever.”

“Well, I’m glad you didn’t,” Loki said, raising his glass to toast with yours.

“Me too,” you smiled.

You’d finished your meal and were gazing at the dual moons in the sky for a while before it started to get chilly. 

“Time for some magic research?” he asked.

You nodded, and he packed up the picnic and led you down a few corridors, and up some stairs. You remembered the sigil from the map when you saw it. Two horns were carved along with other engravings into his ornate door. You followed him in, and tried not to seem surprised at the lavishness of the room. You’d thought your room was large, but you were wrong. This room was enormous, with room enough to host a well-attended party. The walls were largely bookshelves, with armchairs scattered through the room. There was a fireplace large enough to fit a small elephant inside of, and huge windows on the far wall.

You found yourself standing next to the doors just taking it all in. The wonders of this palace never ceased, it seemed. 

“Princess,” he said. “Are you alright?”

“Yeah,” you blinked. “Sorry, I just… Your palace is very different from mine. I’m not used to such large, opulent spaces.”

“It does take some getting used to,” he sighed. “I would be much happier in a cozier room, but Odin would not have me be anywhere else. It would send a message, he says.”

He frowned, and waited for you to take a few steps into the room. You couldn’t help but feel a little excited nervous energy in the tips of your fingers. You were alone with him in his room. It felt very intimate suddenly.

“I keep the books on magic over here,” he said, walking over to a bookshelf near the window. He picked a book off the shelf and admired it, lovingly.

Just then you heard the doors to his room open, and before you could register what was going on, a figure flew past you and towards Loki. At first you thought you might be under attack, but on further inspection, you saw that it was simply a woman. A woman who was now kissing Loki.

You blinked, unsure you were seeing what you thought you were. A very beautiful woman was kissing Loki, you were sure of it now.

“My dear, please,” Loki said, somewhat irritated, pulling out of the embrace. “Can’t you see we have a guest?”

You felt a tightness in your chest and an unpleasant twisting in your stomach. The woman turned, and you saw the fullness of her face, the brightness of her eyes. You saw the shapliness of her figure and the way her hand was melded into Loki’s. 

“I’m so sorry, darling,” she giggled. “I just missed you so.”

Your jaw was wide open, and it took a conscious effort to close it. Loki looked at you somewhat guiltily.

“This is my--”   
“Nearly fiance,” the woman finished, grinning. “I mean, quite nearly,” she giggled. “I’m Hava,” she smiled at you. 

Your body felt stiff. This felt like a nightmare. You shook your head to clear the strange feelings, and met her outstretched hand.    
“Nice to meet you,” you managed, throwing Loki a look. 

Though you hadn’t known him that long, you thought he might have mentioned that he was in a serious relationship. You had only half thought that the kiss had simply been a way to get you to reveal your magic, rather than something new and special as you had thought it might be. You were disappointed in yourself for feeling so disappointed.

Loki avoided your gaze, instead looking towards the window. 

“Darling, I have much to unpack, you know how I take too many things when I visit my parents.”

“Mmm,” Loki answered absently.

“I guess I’ll leave you to it,” you said, trying your best not to sound as awkward as you felt.

Loki’s attention snapped to you, and he pressed his lips together into a thin line, contemplating something before speaking. 

“I’ll walk you out,” he offered. 

You nodded and waved to Hava before leaving the room. Once you were safely outside the room, Loki spoke.    
“I’m sorry to have sprung that on you,” he said quietly. 

“You have nothing to be sorry about,” you shook your head. “It’s not against the law to have a fiance.”

“We’re not engaged,” he said curtly. 

“Right, well, tell her that,” you smirked, pushing his arm playfully. 

He didn’t laugh. 

“I don’t want you to think ill of me,” he said seriously, taking your hands in his. “I only… kissed you,” he barely whispered, “To catch you off guard, to release your magic.”

“I know,” you said, though your heart hurt to hear it confirmed. “It’s fine, I don’t think any less of you.”

He studied your features closely for a while before nodding and releasing your hands. 

“I should attend to her,” he said, glancing towards the door to his room. “You will join us tomorrow?” he asked. “Something fun, together?” 

You wanted to curl up into a ball and not leave your room for weeks, but you managed a smile. 

“Sounds good,” you answered, feeling your throat threatening to close around the words and not let them out. “Just come get me when you’re ready.”

He nodded and left you alone in the hallway. You leaned against the cold stone wall and closed your eyes for a moment. Taking a deep breath, you reminded yourself that your feelings were quite new. Only less than twenty-four hours ago, you’d barely thought of him as a friend. Now you were disappointed he wouldn’t become something more? It seemed ridiculous, and yet your heart insisted it was true. Perhaps just because it had taken you a while to realize, didn’t mean it wasn’t true. Still, it seemed unlikely to happen now. You felt quite hopeless, and so you took a walk to calm your nerves.

You finally wandered into your room in the wee hours. Leia was asleep in her chambers. You lay in your bed thinking for a long time until you finally fell asleep.

It was late the next day when Loki knocked on your door. You’d only just risen about an hour before, though it was well into the afternoon. 

You were dressed in tight fitting pants and a billowy shirt, your hair braided to stay out of your face in case you were going adventuring. You opened the door to see your company similarly dressed. You couldn’t help but notice Hava’s beautiful hair and stunning eyes accented by only a small amount of makeup. 

“Afternoon,” you greeted. “What are we doing today?”

“Hava thought it might be nice to do a bit of horseback riding, and then picnic somewhere,” Loki offered. “If you’re up for it.”

“Sure,” you smiled. 

You picked Firestorm again, mounting her easily and waiting for the others. Hava and Loki shared a horse, and you couldn’t help but imagine what it must be like to be her in that moment, pressed against him, his chest to her back. You blinked, tearing your attention back to your horse who you petted fondly. 

“Lead the way,” you offered, following them out of the stable. The guards who followed stayed a respectable distance back.

“So, where are you from?” Hava asked. You told her, and saw her smirk slightly. 

“Oh,” she nodded. “Quite different from here,” she said. 

“Yes,” you answered. “I’ve felt quite spoiled here.”

“I bet,” she laughed. It might have been friendly, if not for the somewhat patronizing tone. 

“And you’re from here?” you asked. 

“Oh no,” she answered.

She named the land she was from and your eyes grew. The kingdom she hailed from was even richer than Asgard. A union between her and Loki would bring a lot of wealth to both of them. 

“How did you meet?” you asked. “Your kingdom is across the sea, is it not?”

“It is,” she nodded. “It was a chance encounter while Loki was traveling.”

You remembered him mentioning his excursions, his getting lost now and then. You met his eyes and saw that he looked somewhat guilty for some reason. 

“Lucky you two,” you managed. 

You rode for a while longer, making small talk, but mostly half listening to Hava talk. She was nice enough, but she didn’t feel real. It felt like she was a shell of a person, programmed to speak exactly the way you expected her to. Perhaps you were just feeling jealous, you thought. You were trying to see what Loki must see in her, but you failed to. 

“We’re here,” she said, when you’d come upon an open field. 

The grasses were yellow and warm. The sky was just clear enough to let the sun warm you. In the middle of the vast field stood a dying tree. No leaves grew on it, and its bark looked old and weathered.

“Makes me think of the moons,” you said, only to Loki. “Perhaps someone should plant another, it looks quite lonely.”

“All great and precious things are lonely,” Hava said with a small smile. 

You puzzled over that for a moment.    
“That sounds familiar,” you said. 

“A Midgardian author,” Loki smiled at her. “One of my favorites.”

She beamed at him, like a child would at a proud teacher. Perhaps this was what he liked in her, maybe they too had similar tastes.

“Should we eat by the tree then?” you asked. “Perhaps we’ll make it a little less great and precious for an afternoon.”

Loki smiled at this and nodded, leading the horse to the tree. You followed, and you tied your horses to the branches while you set up your lunch.

Loki leaned his back against the tree, and Hava was quick to snuggle up against him once everything was laid out. You couldn't help but think of the previous night when it had been just you and Loki together. He had seemed so relaxed then. Now you saw the tension he was holding in his jaw and the agitated way he moved his hands. 

“Have you seen the king and queen since you’ve been back?” you asked, trying to think of anything to start a conversation.    
“Oh no, not yet,” Hava answered. “You know it’s funny how alike Loki and I are. We both come from families where we’re… different, sort of outside the norm for the family. I’m not that close to either of our parents, really. Neither is he. Are you, darling? We’re lone wolves, together.”

He took a breath before answering, and you had a hard time reading his face. You thought of his interaction with his mother, and wondered why she thought he wasn’t at least close to her.

“I suppose in a way,” he nodded. “My parents have left for a few days, anyway,” he added. “They just missed each other.”

“Do your parents miss you?” she asked you. “You’ve been here a while if you got here right after I left.”

“My father,” you nodded. “Yes, he writes to me. I hope to see him again soon one way or another.”

“Oh yes, you’re meant to marry Prince Thor,” she smiled. “A handsome one.”

You could feel Loki’s eyes on you, waiting for your reaction. 

“Yes,” you answered. “But also very kind, and very fun.”

“I suppose most girls would go for him,” she shrugged. “I guess I’m not like most girls.”

You had to pretend to look at something behind you so you could roll your eyes. It wasn’t your imagination or your jealousy, you did hate this girl simply because she was awful.

“Why don’t I leave you two to have a nice romantic picnic,” you suggested, feeling the need to get away from Hava as quickly as possible. Not only could you not stand her, you couldn’t stand the sight of her constantly touching him. You stood up and started to untie your horse. “You just got back, I shouldn’t be here intruding, although I appreciate the invite.”

“No, stay,” Loki said, pushing Hava gently off of him to stand beside you. 

To your satisfaction she looked put out.

“No no,” you said firmly. “You enjoy each other’s company, I’ll return to the palace, maybe look up that Midgardian author if I can find him.”

Loki seemed quite torn. 

“Darling,” Hava said, standing. “It would be nice.”

He was still facing you and he closed his eyes for a breath before turning to her. 

“Of course,” he said finally. “Thank you,” he said to you. 

“No problem,” you said. And it was not a lie. It was the opposite of a problem to get out of this for you.

You mounted your horse and bid them goodbye, stopping beside the guards who had followed you here. 

“Would one of you mind showing me the way back?” you asked. “I’m afraid I wasn’t paying much attention on the way in.”

“Of course, m’lady,” one said. He was very young looking with bright red hair and thick arms. 

You rode a little way in silence before you said anything.    
“Have you worked here long?” you asked. 

“Five years,” he said. 

“Always Loki’s guard?” 

“We swap out,” he smiled kindly at you. 

You shouldn’t ask… but you had to.

“And you guard Princess Hava as well?”

“When she’s with the prince, yes.”

“She doesn’t need protection otherwise?” you asked. 

“She doesn’t have magic, m’lady,” the guard said. “No one’s after her.”

You blinked, surprised at this. To you it seemed that Loki belonged with someone who shared his talent, his passion for magic. Still, you supposed that was just your wishful thinking.

“I see,” you said. “And the king and queen, do they approve?”

He looked at you guiltily, like he shouldn’t be gossiping with you. 

“Sorry,” you said, realizing the position you were putting him in. “I shouldn’t have asked. I’m just curious is all.”

“I don't think they’d be opposed to the marriage,” he finally answered. “She’s from a very wealthy kingdom.”

“Yes, I know,” you sighed. 

“But I don’t think many people like her, if you don’t mind me saying,” he said slowly. 

You chuckled and smiled at him. 

“I absolutely don’t,” you promised. 

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Ooo a little wrinkle in the plans eh? :)
> 
> Right now I have 13 chapters planned, and not sure if I'll continue after that or not just as a heads up! Thanks for all the love!


	8. You’re Either Born with it or You’re Not

You woke with the sun, although not on purpose. You’d barely slept the night before. Ever since you’d returned from your outing with Loki and Hava, you couldn’t stop thinking about them. You closed your eyes and you saw her hand claiming his, him smiling proudly at her. You hated yourself for feeling so jealous about a man you’d not even made up your mind about. 

Taking a breath, you decided to take a walk. This had become a pastime for you lately as it helped you think. The halls were empty save for a few servants getting things ready for the day, and it was peaceful. You journeyed out to the front steps of the palace and reflected on your first day here. So much had changed in less than a month. You were watching the gates thinking of that time, when you saw men hurrying towards them suddenly. You walked hesitantly down the steps to get a closer look. They were Asgardian men, you could tell, but you weren’t sure what they were doing. As they got closer, the two men seemed to be carrying something. Someone. The blonde hair came into view, and your stomach dropped as you saw they were carrying Thor. His body seemed limp and lifeless, though you could tell by the men’s worried faces he was not dead. The urgency to preserve life was there, and you felt your pulse quicken. 

“What’s happened?” you asked, running to keep up with their pace. 

Thor groaned and his eyes fluttered open at the sound of your voice. 

“Princess,” he muttered. 

You looked to the men for answers. 

“The border dispute turned ugly,” one of the men answered. “He got the worse end of a spear to the gut protecting Lady Sif.”

You took control of the hallways, directing people out of your way and helping them seamlessly navigate to the healer’s wing. You held the doors open as they made their way through to healers who immediately went to work. Turning your attention to the hallway for just a moment, you saw the last person you wanted to. 

“Hava,” you yelled. She turned to you and smiled too wide. 

“Go find Loki, his brother’s been injured severely.”

She looked startled, like she’d been frozen.    
“Go now!” you nearly screamed. 

She jumped at your words and nodded, running off quickly.

You sighed, leaning against the door and trying to get your heart to calm down. You watched the healers surround Thor but gave them space. There was nothing for you to do right now. You thought of what Loki had mentioned about healing magic, and wished he’d had time to teach you some before now.

Would he even have time for you with Hava back now? How would you secretly practice magic without her suspecting something was up? You sat down and laid your head in your hands. Just as things had started to come together, they were now falling apart. You stayed like that for a long while, until a healer approached you. 

“Some water, m’lady?” she asked, touching your shoulder gently. 

“Yes,” you answered thankfully, taking the proffered glass. You felt the liquid coat your dry throat and suddenly wondered how long you’d been here. You’d been in a kind of meditative state. Surely Loki would have come and seen you, said something by now. 

“How is Thor?” you asked. “I’m sorry, how long have I been here?”

“It’s been a few hours,” the woman answered, looking rightly dubious of your sanity. “He’s stabilized. They’re lucky they got him here when they did. He’s not out of the woods though.”

“Can I see him?” you asked. 

“He’s sleeping right now,” she answered. “But you’re welcome to wait with him. He’ll probably be out for another hour or so.”

“Has his brother been by?” you checked. 

“No, m’lady,” she said. 

You nodded and she left you to yourself. If Thor would be out for a while, you were going to figure out what the fuck happened to Loki. What could be more important than his brother? You marched to his room, your anger at the situation begging to be directed somewhere more tangible. You banged loudly on the door, and heard a rustling before it opened. 

Loki answered in a robe, pulling it closed over his bare chest, his hair disheveled. Behind him you saw Hava in bed, sheets pulled up around her. Her face dropped when she saw you.

“What the fuck?” was all you could manage.

Loki looked bemused. 

“Good morning to you too, princess,” Loki chuckled. Then, reading your features, his face dropped. “What’s wrong?”

“What’s wrong?” you asked, pushing through the door. “You didn’t fucking tell him?” you asked Hava.

She gave you her best doe eyes and pushed her knees to her chest. 

“Tell me what?” Loki asked, directing your attention back to him. His voice was grave. 

“Your brother almost died this morning,” you spat. “Stabbed at the border. He’s stable for now, but they don’t know…” you stopped before you would have started crying. You bit your lip. “Whatever, I’m going back to the healing wing.”

“I’m coming with you,” Loki said. “Give me two minutes to change.”

“I’ll come too,” Hava said. 

Loki turned on her with energy you’d never felt from him before. 

“Why didn’t you fucking tell me my brother was  _ dying _ ?” he raged at her, his voice making even you jump.

She tried her best to look innocent. 

“I knew it would upset you, and there was nothing you could have done… So I wanted to make you happy while I could… before you were sad again.”

He faltered for a moment, though the tension in his shoulders and neck remained. You didn’t care to wait for him or anyone else, you simply left, leaving him to follow if he wanted to. In a way, you could see her logic, though you knew if anyone pulled that with you, you’d be furious. You stopped by the kitchen to get something to eat before grabbing a chair and settling in next to Thor’s bed. He looked smaller somehow, and you held his hand in yours to assure yourself that he was still the big strong man you remembered. His hand dwarfed yours, but you held on, trying to anchor him to this world.

There was a small knock on the half opened door, but you didn’t bother looking. You knew who would be there.

“How is he?” Loki asked, silently pulling up another chair on the opposite side of the bed. 

“Alive,” you shrugged. “The nurse said he’d probably wake up soon.”

Loki nodded, looking at his brother carefully. 

“He was protecting Sif,” you said. 

“Of course,” Loki smiled softly. 

There was silence, and you knew he would fill it with words you didn’t care to hear. 

“I’m sorry about that,” he said. “What you had to see back in my room. Hava she… has good intentions but they’re not always the right things to do.”

“It’s fine,” you dismissed.

“You know before you, I didn’t have many friends,” Loki said quietly. “Except my brother. Occasionally. I was lonely,” he admitted. “But Hava… liked me. She wanted to be around me even with my magic and all its stigma. That was not something I was used to. And I craved it. And it made things that she did like this seem… worth it.”

You nodded, understanding the draw. You weren’t exactly winning any popularity contests in your kingdom, and the thought of a friend would have meant a lot. Perhaps you would have ignored similar character flaws.

“Well, she’s not your only friend anymore,” you said, barely managing to look at him. 

When you did, you only saw her naked in his sheets, his bedrangeld hair, and you quickly looked away. Was it always going to be this hard to be his friend?

“I’m sorry,” you said finally. “I know you didn’t know… I know you weren’t being insensitive or uncaring. I’m sorry if I was rude. I just…. I’m so mad at this,” you gestured to the giant bandage that was Thor’s torso.

“I know,” he said. “But Sif will get her justice, and remedy the situation. Of that I am sure.”

You nodded absently, and the two of you fell into a comfortable silence for a long time. Again you fell into a sort of meditative state and lost track of time. When Thor finalls stirred, you could feel from your aching muscles it had been another few hours. 

“Princess,” Thor muttered, his eyes fluttering open to see you. “Brother,” he greeted with a small smile. 

You yelled for a healer who quickly came in to assess him. While she was looking him over, you shared a look with Loki, relief. You walked to the other side of the bed where you simply hugged him, burying your face in his black hair.

“He’s okay,” you whispered, almost to yourself. 

“He’s okay,” Loki whispered back.

You felt your magics connecting at the contact and looked at him. You wondered if he felt this tingling, this physical pull towards Hava when he touched her. He gazed at you for a long while before you both pulled away.

“I am glad to see you’re awake, brother,” Loki said.

“I am glad to be awake,” Thor laughed, already sounding more like himself.

You sat on the bed and took Thor’s face in your hand.    
“Don’t do something stupid like that again,” you warned. “I almost died of shock just seeing you carried in this morning.”

“Perhaps it is best that mother and father are away then,” Thor smirked. “I do not believe they would be any less affected, though they have seen it many times.”

You chatted a while longer with Thor, hearing about what had happened at the border, and trying to keep his mind off Sif. He eventually drifted to sleep in the middle of a conversation, but the healer confirmed it wasn’t anything serious, he just needed to rest. 

“You should get some rest, princess,” Loki noted. “If you were up when he was brought in, you’ll be running on fumes soon.”

“I guess,” you sighed, looking at Thor. “Feels wrong to leave him.”

“I will inform the healers to find us should anything change,” he promised. “But we’ll be no good to him if we’re falling asleep standing up.”

You nodded and followed him out into the hallway. It was getting late now, the sun having already set. 

“Actually, could I borrow a book on magical healing?” you asked. “I was thinking about it when they brought him in. I think I’d like to focus my attention there to begin with.”

“Of course. I can have someone deliver it to your room, or you could walk with me?” 

You debated this.

“Hava will be there,” he warned. “I would understand if you’d rather not see her right now.”

You sighed, feeling like a bad friend. 

“No it’s fine,” you said. “She was just trying to protect you, I guess.”

He nodded, though it seemed without conviction. 

“I’ll come with you,” you said, hoping the walk would help ease your nerves so you might actually sleep.

Loki opened the door to his room and you saw Hava come out of the closet in a nightgown. 

“How is he?” she asked sheepishly. 

“Better,” you answered civilly. 

“Good,” she smiled. 

Loki went to the shelves on the far wall while you stood at the door. 

“I’m just borrowing a book,” you said. “Then I’ll leave you alone.”

She glanced at the title Loki was retrieving. 

“Healing magic,” she brightened. “When I get magic, that’s the first I want to learn.”

Loki stopped in his tracks, and you both stared at her, confused. 

“I’m sorry, darling, when you what?” Loki asked. 

“When I get magic,” she repeated. “You know, when we get married and all that.”

Your expression of confusion matched Loki’s. He cleared his throat and looked at her. 

“What gave you that impression?” he asked. 

“You can’t give someone magic,” you interjected.

“Of course you can,” Hava grinned. 

Loki looked confused and irritated. 

“No, you can’t,” he said, stepping towards you. “You’re either born with it or you’re not.”

She blinked, frowning.    
“You’re lying,” she said, sounding almost scared.

“He’s not,” you assured her. “It’s pretty well-known.”

She pouted, and looked like she might cry. 

“But I thought he was powerful enough to… people said he could…” 

“Listen,” Loki said gently, walking towards her. “I don’t know who told you that, but there have been mages far more powerful than me and none have done what you’re suggesting. I’m sorry.”

She huffed, and dropped her head. It was quiet for a moment, and you glanced fleetingly at Loki who looked equally confused and expectant. Then suddenly, she raised her head. 

She looked completely different. Her features, instead of their once cheery and bright composition, now looked tired and angry. For once, you felt her authenticity. All the sweetness dropped from her face and she glared at Loki. 

“So what the fuck did I pay your servant for?” she asked, almost to herself. She grabbed a nearby vase and threw it across the roo. 

“What?” Loki asked, vocalizing the same question you had.

She rubbed her head with her hands for a moment and let out a guttural groan. Then she laughed harshly.

“Well it’s not like I  _ actually _ know or like anything you like,” she smirked. “I had to pay your servant to find you, accidentally bump into you, and then convince you to marry me,” she said. “I thought you could… They said you could…” she muttered, the wheels turning in her head on how she could have gotten this wrong.

“So you don’t… none of this was real?” Loki asked. You could tell he was trying to sound indifferent, but he did not quite succeed.

“Yeh right,” she laughed. “A ifs  _ I  _ would ever love  _ you.” _

You made to storm over there and punch her or at least yell at her, but Loki’s arm stopped you. Instead, you watched as she gave one last dirty look and made for the door.

She slammed the doors, leaving two completely dumbfounded people in her wake.

You turned to Loki, but all you could manage was an arched eyebrow. After a moment of collecting himself, he gestured for you to take a seat on the closest loveseat beside him. 

“What the fuck?” you asked, almost laughing at the absurdity. 

“I… I don’t know,” he admitted. “Wait here a moment.”

He went to the door and called for his servant. The servant must have known something was wrong, because he looked extremely guilty. Loki brought him to the center of the room in front of where you stood. 

“Would you like to explain what Hava meant by asking what she paid my servant for?” Loki asked. 

His voice was calm, but you could feel the anger underneath it like a riptide waiting to swallow the boy at one wrong move.

The boy, no older than sixteen, started to cry. 

“I’m sorry, sir,” he sniffed. “She told me she’d pay me for information on you. I just had to tell her the stuff you liked, what you did, how you reacted to things… I needed the money, sir.”

Loki looked like he might explode, his features contorting in rage. You stepped in, putting a hand on Loki’s arm and startling him out of his anger. 

“I think she thought that Loki could give her magic,” he shrugged. “I didn’t know any better so I said maybe he could.”   
Loki covered his face with his hand. 

“Go,” he said to the boy. “And don’t come back.”

You shot the boy a sympathetic look before he left, and waited for Loki to speak.

“You must think me a fool,” he said finally, sitting on the loveseat with his head in his hands.

“No,” you promised, sitting next to him.

“So embarrassing,” he regretted. “I am by far the best liar in this kingdom, and yet was completely deceived.”

You shrugged, thinking if it were you in a similar position. 

“I know I was lonely enough back in my kingdom,” you offered. “If someone seemed to like the things I liked, enjoyed my company… I might look over a few red flags.”

He got up and started pacing the length of the room. 

“It’s just… I like being different, I like that people fear me a little. But letting someone in was… unexpectedly nice. And now…”

“So you start over,” you offered, careful not to give yourself away by the eagerness in your voice. “Find someone else.”

He scoffed at the idea. 

“Who else would possibly love me?” he asked, more to himself than to you. 

You got up and made your way to the door, sensing his need to process this alone.    
“I think you’d be surprised,” you answered before slipping out.


	9. Quietly Fantastic

You brought Thor fresh flowers for his room along with a hearty breakfast prepared by the kitchen. He was still bedridden, but seemed to have progressed well overnight. 

“What a way to wake up,” Thor smiled as you entered his room.

“I thought you might want some company,” you offered. 

“I always enjoy your company.”

“Did you hear?” you asked, settling in next to him on a chair. 

“Of my brother’s lady?” Thor asked grimly. “Yes.”

“Will she be reprimanded?” you asked. 

“I doubt it,” Thor frowned. “She is very powerful, I would not wish to even slap her wrists, though I’d like to do more than that.”

“That was probably the lowest of the low,” you agreed. “Tricking someone into loving you to steal something from them.”

“You know I try to see the good in people,” Thor said. “But I’m not sure I can in her. My brother is very sensitive, I worry about him now. I worry he won’t trust anyone again.”

“I don’t know,” you said. “He’s very resilient. I think now that he’s had a taste for it, he might not be able to stop himself from trying to find that feeling again. For real this time.”

“I hope so,” he answered. 

“I mean, he’s kind, and sweet, once you get to know him. And so  _ so _ smart.” The words were tumbling out of you without your permission. “And he’s tactful, you know? Which I personally feel in an underrated trait, and--” 

You stopped talking when you saw Thor grinning at you. 

“What?” you asked. 

“I suppose this means you won’t marry me,” he said.

“What do you mean?” you asked. “Why not?”

“You’re in love with Loki,” he said simply. 

You swallowed hard, trying to find a way to deny it that would not give you away. It took a second too long, and Thor laughed. 

“You are,” he grinned. “You’re in love with my brother.”

You sighed and tucked a loose strand of hair behind your ear.    
“I don’t know if I’m in love with him,” you countered. “But I certainly… might eventually be.”

Thor clapped his hands together and let out an excited yell. 

“I knew it. I knew it from the moment you two met.”   
“You did not,” you laughed. “I didn’t even notice until recently.”

“You’re the same, you and him. Quietly fantastic.”

You smiled softly at this compliment. If he thought you on the same tier as his brother, he must think very highly of you.

“I stand by my offer,” you said. “I promised you I would marry you to stop the horribleness that has been thrust upon you by stupid rules.”

He shook his head. 

“I wouldn’t allow it,” he said. “I will find another way to be with her.” He looked at you for a short while before asking, “Are you going to tell him?”

You laughed and shook your head. 

“Well, seeing as he’s just been dumped and probably wouldn’t trust anyone right now, no,” you said. “But we’ll see after a while when things calm down.”

You didn't see Loki all day, but you did see Sif. As many had promised, she had resolved the issue at the border and the man responsible for Thor’s injury had been dealt with, though you didn’t ask the particulars of what she meant by that.

You left them alone in Thor’s room in the healer’s ward and felt the warmth between them growing.

You couldn’t sleep that night, although that was no surprise. Leia had long since gone to bed, and you had a few candles lit, trying to focus on some reading instead of focusing on not falling asleep. There was a light rap on the door that pulled your attention away from re-reading the same page for the third time around midnight.

You wrapped your dressing robe around you, half expecting no one to be at the door when you opened it, the knock had been so light. But Loki stood there, looking as tired as you felt. 

“I saw light under your door,” was all he said. 

You stepped aside and let him come into your room. 

“Are you alright?” you asked, pulling your robe closed a little better. 

“Yes,” he said absently. “No,” he amended. “I’m… not sure.”

“Couldn’t sleep?” you guessed. He shook his head. “Me either.”

He wandered over to the trunk at the foot of your bed and sat on it. 

“I just keep thinking about her,” he said. “All the things I missed, that I should have seen. I’m not sure how I can trust myself again.”

You walked carefully over to him and sat down. 

“If it’s any logical consolation, I think the odds of anyone trying to trick you into giving them magic is very slim, as most people know it’s not possible,” you smirked. 

He smiled half heartedly.

“I think it was brave of you to fall in love at all,” you said seriously. “So it wasn’t the right person, it was still brave.”

“You really think that?” he asked, finally looking at you.   
“I do,” you nodded. “I mean, I never let anyone get close because, well, you know… But you did. You let someone in. That’s braver than I’ve ever been.”

“You let me in,” Loki countered. You rolled your eyes. 

“I sort of had to, if you’ll recall.”

“Ah, yes,” he smiled and laughed softly. “Still, you trust me now, don’t you?”

You nodded. 

“I do,” you promised.

He shook his head as if a thought had come to clear away the others. 

“How is Sif?” he asked. “I heard of her return.”

“She is well,” you said. “She’s with Thor.”

“Has he had second thoughts about your offer since seeing her?” he asked, his expression unreadable.

“Yes,” you said, though you knew it was not changed because of her.

“So you will not be married then?” he asked. 

“No,” you answered. The thought made you realize you might have to leave soon if you were not to marry him.

“I suppose he’ll want to make Odin think it’s a possibility for a while longer to put off any other suitors.”

“I suppose,” you said absently. “But… I will have to leave eventually.”

Your stomach clenched at the thought. You weren’t that far away, but you doubted Loki would be allowed to travel to a kingdom so hateful of magic as yours very often.

“You do not wish to go home?” Loki asked. 

“I miss my father,” you said. “But I have grown to love it here.”

“I have grown to love having you here,” Loki smiled. 

“I hope I can stay a while longer,” you said, frowning at the thought of ever leaving. “I know I’ll be letting Odin down, I think he likes me.”

“He’s quite eager for an heir,” Loki nodded. “And I think you are his favorite so far.”

“I wonder if that would change if he found out about my magic,” you smirked. 

“Ah,” Loki laughed softly. “It might.”

“Speaking of,” you said. “Since we’re both insomniacs, maybe a bit of magic practice might help tire us out?”

Loki quirked an eyebrow and smiled. 

“Alright,” he nodded. “But let’s go to my room. We don’t need your secret accidentally revealed so soon,” he said, pointing to Leia’s door. 

You nodded and followed him down the cold corridors to his room. When you entered, you saw the events that had unfolded, the betrayal that he had seen, and you shuddered. You wondered if that had happened to you if you’d ever trust anyone again. Still, there was something in Loki, something in his magic and in his general being that made you trust him with perhaps foolish confidence. 

“Why don’t we try some simple levitation first?” Loki asked. 

“Okay,” you smiled, feeling your magic already buzzing. 

Loki stood behind you and pointed to a glass of water on a table. 

“Focus on that,” he nearly whispered by your ear. 

You did as he asked, asking your magic to move the glass of water even an inch. You saw it twitch and laughed with joy. Reining in the feeling of victory you focused more on the glass and felt your magic simmering. With a force that threw your hair back, you shot that glass up into the air. The last thing you remembered before blacking out was the sound of shattering.

When you woke, your head was resting on something soft. You were facing the fireplace in Loki’s room. A pleasant sensation had roused you - fingers running through your hair. You realized slowly that your head was on Loki’s lap. You were laid on the couch in front of the fireplace for some reason. How had you gotten here? You realized you should sit up, but the feeling of him all around you, running his fingers through your hair was overwhelming. 

He seemed to sense you waking, and stopped, which prompted you to sit up. 

“Slowly,” he warned softly, guiding your shoulders until you were upright. 

“What happened?” you asked, your head begging to be laid down again once it was upright.

“A kind of magic overdose,” Loki frowned. “It was… a little frightening. You passed out and started shaking so I brought you to the couch and tried to sooth you the best I could.”

It had worked, you wanted to say. Besides the headache that spread down your neck, you didn’t seem any worse for wear, and Loki didn’t seem too shaken. 

“Is that normal?” you asked.

“It’s not unheard of,” he assured you. “Especially for mages who have suppressed their magic.”

“Sorry I scared you,” you said. 

“No need to apologize,” he promised. “How are you feeling?”

“Alright,” you said. You looked at his face, the concern contorting his features. You didn’t think, you just put a hand up to his face, running your hand along his jaw and holding him. “I’m fine,” you promised. “Don’t look so worried.”   
He blinked and seemed to register that emotion was showing at all on his face, for it relaxed into a mask of neutrality. 

“I feel so lame,” you laughed, returning your hand to your lap. “One cast and I pass out.”

“Don’t,” he promised. “The first time I tried to transform myself into a snake, I only turned one of my legs into the tail. I had to walk-slither places for two days until I figured it out.”

You laughed with him for a moment and sighed.

“At least one of us got some sleep tonight,” you noted. “What time is it anyway?”

“You were only out for an hour,” he said. “It’s only one.”

“Oh,” you frowned. “I don’t feel like I could sleep right now even though I’m exhausted.”

“Me either,” Loki said. 

You pulled your knees up to your chest and gazed at the fire. 

“Why don’t you tell me a story?” you asked. 

He arched an eyebrow but you turned your gaze to the fire and waited patiently. He began a story, but his voice was so soothing that before he could even get past his first few sentences, you passed out.

You woke when the sun hit your face in the morning. Blindly feeling around you, you realized you were in a bed. As you opened your eyes you realized it wasn’t your bed. Looking around you saw you were still in Loki’s room. Loki stood by the large window across the room staring out at the morning sun hitting the town below. He looked rather peaceful there, and you were loathed to disturb him, but you realized you were probably impeding on his day. 

“Morning,” you greeted, slipping out of the bed. 

When he turned, you saw how tired he was.

“Sorry I fell asleep. I really didn’t think I’d be able to.”   
“I suppose my stories are just boring enough,” he smirked. 

“It wasn’t that,” you laughed. “I think that magic stuff just took it right out of me.” He nodded knowingly. 

“It’s like using a new muscle,” he shrugged. “It’ll just take time.”

“Thanks for moving me to the bed,” you said. “I feel a lot better after sleeping comfortably.”

“No problem,” he answered. 

“I hope I didn’t put you out.”

“I would not have slept,” he promised.

“Still thinking about Hava?” you guessed. 

He was still for a moment, his face unreadable. 

“Yes,” he answered. Something about his hesitation and the timbre of his voice gave you pause, but you accepted this answer. 

“Time heals all wounds,” you said absently, looking around for anything you’d left that you might need to take with you.

You wondered what Leia would think of you spending the night out.

“I think it’s already starting,” he said. His smile seemed genuine and it made you smile back. 

“Good,” you said, walking over to him. “Thanks again for the lesson, even if it was a short one.”

He smiled and gave you a nod as you touched his arm in thanks before heading towards the door.    
“Maybe we take today off,” you said. “If you’re up for it we could try tomorrow night.”

“Sounds like a plan,” he said. 

You smiled and left the room, closing the door behind you, only to be stopped by a familiar face. 

“You told him?” Thor asked eagerly, seeing you exit his brother’s room. 

You laughed slightly and shook your head. 

“No,” you said. “I just was… hanging out and fell asleep. He kindly let me sleep in his bed while he…” you hesitated knowing he didn’t sleep at all, but added, “Slept on the couch.”

Thor looked slightly disappointed at this.

“Well, you will soon,” he said decidedly. “But in the meantime, I think it would be good if we were seen together at least a few times a week in public. Until, you know.”

“Right,” you said. “How’s that going, the working up the courage bit?”

“I’m trying to build up Sif’s career so father will value her as a soldier and commander. I think that might help.”

“Probably wouldn’t hurt,” you shrugged, unsure what would change Odin’s mind, if anything. “Did you want to hang out today?”

“That sounds lovely,” Thor smiled. “Perhaps a walk through the village?”

You went to your room to change quickly, but met Thor outside your door for your walk. You made sure to hold hands and smile, especially when you passed in front of his parents. You wondered if they would be sad to see you go, or if they didn’t care for you so much as the promise of an heir.

When you were outside of the palace gates, many villagers thronged you. They wanted to meet Thor, to touch him. Many asked him to summon his hammer, and he did, to the delight of kids and adults alike.

It was so different than being with Loki. For one, you didn’t have palace guards following you around, and for another, people flocked to you. While the energy they brought with them was positive, you weren’t sure you cared for the attention. Perhaps being feared and a little hated wasn’t great, but at least your social anxiety levels were manageable. With Thor it felt like you were in the spotlight at all times. 

When Thor finally placated the crowd, you managed to slip down a few less populated allies for a quiet moment or two.

“Sorry about all that,” he muttered. “The people seem to like to talk to me.”

“You’re very accessible,” you noted. “You have an open face.”

He smiled. 

“I suppose it’s easier to talk to me rather than my father,” he shrugged. “And rather than Loki. How is my brother, by the way?”

“He’s… doubting himself,” you sighed. “He’s disappointed he didn’t see it coming.”

“I’m not sure how he could have,” Thor said. “Everyone trusted her.”

“That’s the point,” you frowned. “He thought he was a better, I don’t know, lie detector than that.”

Thor chuckled softly, and you turned to him, confused. 

“My brother has always thought himself the king of deception. I cannot say that my inner child is sad to see he was knocked down a peg in that belief.”

You smiled wryly and continued walking. 

“I think it’ll just take time,” you said. 

“And you,” he added.

“How long do you think we can get away with making them think we’re courting without actually getting engaged?” you asked. 

Thor frowned, looking at the dying leaves on the trees.

“Not much longer,” he admitted. “My father mentioned winter as an ending.”

“I don’t want to leave,” you said.

“I don’t want you to leave,” Thor smiled softly, taking your hand gently in his. “You must tell Loki how you feel.”

“I’m scared,” you sighed. 

“You know you are always welcome as a guest,” Thor said. “But if you want to stay here permanently, you will need to tell him, and find out if that is an option.”

His bluntness surprised you, but his features seemed resolute in his logic.

“I wouldn’t even know what to say,” you admitted.

“How about this: Hello Loki, I am in love with you.”

You giggled and he smiled back. 

“Not quite poetic enough perhaps?” he chuckled. 

“It might need some work.”

The two of you fell into an easy silence before you hit a more populated street and were swarmed again. This time you hung back, happy to watch from a distance as Thor listened to people, played with children, and laughed.

By the time you got back to the castle it was nearly dinner time and you were rather tired.

You requested dinner be brought to you in your room, and found Leia there when you arrived, sprawled on your bed. 

“Comfortable?” you asked. 

She rolled over, with a somewhat serious expression on her features.

“What?” you asked, surprised at her expression. 

“How long have we got left here?” she asked. 

“I don’t know,” you admitted. “I was just talking about that. A week? Maybe more?”

She frowned and you sat down on the bed with her.

“I don’t want to go either,” you said.

“And you’re not going to marry Thor?” she confirmed. 

You squirmed a little, wondering if you should tell her. Knowing you well, she read this anxiety and perked up, leaning toward you.

“What is it?” she asked. “Are you?”

“Not Thor…” you said softly.

It took her a moment until she sat back in surprise as she realized what you meant. 

“Loki?” she asked.

“If he’ll have me,” you shrugged. “Though I hardly can think of marriage already. I just… I have feelings for him and I’d like to explore them.”

“Wow,” she said. “I mean I know I joked about it but…”

“We have a lot in common believe it or not,” you laughed. 

“I believe it,” she smiled at you. “Now, get dressed for a party and come with me.”   
“What?” you laughed. 

“There’s a servant’s party I’ve been invited to, and you’re my date.”   
“I’m not sure the invitation would be extended to me,” you countered.

“Please,” she laughed, brushing you off. “The way I talk about you, they know you’re cool and not like one of them.”

“You said  _ I  _ was  _ cool _ ?” you acted surprised.

She pushed you playfully and rolled her eyes. 

“Maybe,” she admitted. “A lot of them actually want to meet you,” she added. “You should come. It’ll help take your mind off this Loki business until you figure out what you want to do.”

“How do you know I don’t already know?” you asked. 

“‘Cause you’re you, and you never decide things like that so easily.”

“Fair,” you nodded. “Alright, let me change.”

You changed into a much simpler gown, and did your hair together. After dinner, you followed her down unfamiliar corridors to a somewhat large gathering area. There were a few musicians against the far wall, along with a table laid out with food and drink. The party was already in full swing by the time you arrived, and Leia was treated with a warm welcome. You watched her as she interacted with the other servants. She seemed to truly belong here, and you’d be heartbroken if you had to drag her away from it. 

“Princess,” one of her friends greeted you. “It’s nice to meet you. I’m Sarah, one of Thor’s servants.”

“Nice to meet you,” you shook her hand. 

“Can we get you something to drink?” she asked. 

“Oh, I don’t want to impose,” you said.

“Nonsense,” she smiled. “I’ll get you some wine.”

She returned quickly with the wine and you thanked her for it. You hung out with Sarah and Leia for a while, just chatting and drinking. You learned a little more of what it was like in the palace as a servant. Overall, it didn’t sound too bad. It was certainly better conditions than your palace was able to offer, you realized. When you were a few glasses of wine in, you started tapping your foot to the music, and Leia asked you to dance. You gladly followed her, and had a great time with her on the makeshift dance floor. It was quite different than you were used to, very informal, and thankfully non-judgemental, especially when you busted out some strange movements.

After a lot of upbeat songs, the band decided to start a slow song to calm everyone down a little. You took this opportunity to get a drink of water. You’d worked up a bit of a sweat while dancing, and you needed it. Finding the water not quite enough, you took a moment just to step outside the room. It was growing warm in there, and just outside the door was at least five degrees cooler. You pressed your back against the cool stone of the hallway, but soon your magic stirred.

Looking to your right, you saw Loki had appeared and was watching you carefully. He glanced inside the room to see the servant’s party and gave you an intrigued expression. 

“Leia invited me,” you smiled. “I’m not crashing, I swear.”

“They’re having their annual winter ball again, I see,” he said. 

“Is that it?” you asked. “Gods, winter already.”

“Just about,” he nodded. 

The music filled the silence between you for a moment and you suddenly spoke without your brain’s permission. 

“Would you dance with me?” you asked. 

“I don’t believe I’d be welcome in there,” he shook his head. 

“Then out here,” you shrugged. You could still hear the music well enough.

He smiled softly, a curious mischief in his eyes and nodded. 

“If you would like,” he said. 

He moved slowly, as if letting you decide how close to come up to him. You stepped closer, and slipped one of your hands around the back of his neck. His hand found purchase on your lower back, sending your magic swirling inside you. Your other hand then met his, and your magic nearly jolted at the contact. You wondered if he had left something out while telling you how people’s magics interacted with each other. Surely the contact wasn’t always this intense with everyone. Surely what you felt for him, and what your magic felt for him were connected.

The music was still playing loud enough to hear in the hallway, and the two of you began swaying in the same informal manner that had been the standard all evening for you. 

“Did you enjoy your night with your maid?” he asked. 

“Yes,” you nodded. “Everyone was very nice to me.”

“They accepted you?” he asked, surprised and perhaps a little impressed. 

“Leia said she talks of me as a friend, and so that’s how they feel about me.”

“Still surprises me that you do,” Loki smiled. “I’ve never even thought to befriend a servant.”

“Well, we come from pretty different places,” you said. “Where I grew up, there wasn’t the disparity between our servants and us. Some of course, but not like here,” you explained. “I grew up with her, she was and is my best friend.”   
“And yet you didn’t trust her with your secret,” he noted. You swallowed. 

“I couldn’t risk it with anyone. Not after…”

He nodded and pulled you closer.

“I didn’t mean to make you sad,” he said. “I was simply trying to understand you better.”

“It’s okay,” you promised. “Maybe I should have told her. Maybe she would have been a good shoulder to lean on during those lonely years.”

“You know I offer both my shoulders in sacrifice to you,” he smiled softly. You smiled back. 

You studied him in that moment, and saw the truth. He truly did wish to understand you, a feat you weren’t sure he’d undertaken with many others. You thought about telling him in that moment, with his chest pressed against yours, his face mere inches away, but Leia exited the room before you could speak.

“Oh,” she said, startled. “There you are.”

Loki parted from you, but still stood beside you. Leia glanced between you with a mischievous smile. 

“Sorry to interrupt,” she said. “I just wanted to see if you were ready to call it a night.”

“Yeah,” you nodded, feeling the weight of the night of dancing on you. 

“I might actually, erm, stay,” she said suddenly, as if an idea had struck. “But maybe the prince would be a gentleman and make sure you get back to your room okay.”

You could have killed her for that conspicuous smile, but you simply looked to Loki who nodded. 

“Of course,” he answered. 

“I’ll see you tomorrow, don’t wait up for me,” she smiled. 

And with that, you were alone with Loki again. 

“Shall we?” you asked. He nodded. 

“How are you feeling after the other night?” he asked. “Any left over symptoms?”

“I’m fine,” you promised. “Ready to try again, maybe tomorrow, if you’re up for it?”

“Sure,” he nodded. “I have some things to attend to, but perhaps after dinner.”

“Sounds good,” you agreed.

“You were with Thor today?” Loki asked, after a few moments of silence.

“Yes,” you answered. 

“And you saw him with all the villagers.”

“I did,” you nodded, feeling overwhelmed just at the memory. Loki chuckled at your face. 

“He’s quite loved,” he said. 

“Yes,” you agreed. “It was a bit much. I’m not used to being around so many people, especially who wish to do me no harm.”

Loki nodded knowingly. 

“Do you know, when you first arrived I thought you were just like him.”

“Me?” you laughed. “Why?”

“Well, you’re both quite beautiful, quite genial. People are drawn to you whether you like it or not. I thought you were more outgoing, like him, happy to be around people.”

You eyed him with some pleasure in the fact that he’d just called you beautiful so casually. 

“I thought you were supposed to be able to read people?” you jested. “How didn’t you know that I would rather hole up in my room with a book?”

Loki shrugged.

“Perhaps you have been and always will be a mystery to me, princess.”

You arrived at your door then, and you couldn’t stop yourself from hugging him goodnight. After a moment of your touch, he melded into you, wrapping his arms around you. His scent was familiar, and comforting, and your magic seemed amplified with his heart so close to yours.

“Goodnight,” you whispered before slipping into your room.


	10. Be Patient, Dear One

The following evening, Odin summoned you all for a family dinner. The meal was grand, and you felt an odd pressure on you when you sat down, though no one had said anything. Thor sat next to you, per usual when you had dinner all together, and Odin seemed to be eying you carefully tonight. 

“I’d like to make a toast,” he offered, raising his glass. “I feel by the end of the week, we will have an announcement, and hopefully something to celebrate.”

You glanced quickly at Thor who pressed his lips together into a thin line before attempting a grin. Odin seemed to offer this toast genially, but the statement was clear. You had a week to make up your mind before they kicked you out and summoned another princess from another kingdom to marry off to Thor. You swallowed hard and managed a look at Loki. He was studying his plate, not bothering to lift his glass.

After dinner, Thor pulled you aside in the hallway.    
“A week,” he muttered. 

“How’s it going with your presentation, or whatever you’d like to call it, to your parents about Sif?” you asked. “Think they’ll go for it?”

Thor bit his lip, unsure. 

“Maybe,” he said. “I am sure I must try. How goes your mission with my brother?” he asked. 

You sighed. 

“I just… don’t know how to tell Loki,” you said. 

“Tell me what?” Loki asked, rounding the corner with a mischievous smirk on his features. 

You froze, heat rising to your cheeks. Thor stood at attention. Loki had apparently not expected such reactions, and his smirk dropped to a look of concern. 

“What?” he asked again. 

“Nothing,” you said, managing a smile and a small laugh.

“We were simply wondering how to tell you…” Thor started. “That… the princess…”

“Has never even touched a sword,” you finished, unsure where that came from. 

Loki’s brow creased, clearly not buying this at all. 

“Right,” he said. “And that was difficult to tell me because?”

You looked at Thor for help, but he didn’t seem to be any better at lying than you. 

“Anyway, now you know, and now we can all go our separate ways,” he grinned, slapping his brother on the shoulder before more or less running off down the hallway.

“Magic time?” you asked, hastily walking towards Loki’s room. He followed after you, matching your pace easily.

He stared at you through the entire walk to his room, trying to see through you, it seemed. You tried not to look at him, hoping he’d drop it before you reached his room. When you were inside, you walked over to the fireplace, and turned. He was slowly closing the door, looking at you as if you were under a microscope. The way he moved, slowly and precisely, made you think of a predator stalking its prey.

“You lied to me,” he said darkly. 

Oh fuck, you thought. You couldn’t do that, not after what had happened with Hava, he didn’t deserve that. Still, your stomach twisted with the thought of confessing. What if he laughed at you? You supposed you wouldn’t be long for Asgard anyway, so the embarrassment would only last as long as Thor’s plan took to put in place.

“I’m sorry,” you said, your head dipping. “I didn’t want to.”   
You felt his finger tip your chin back up to look at him. 

“Then why did you?” 

You sighed and closed your eyes for a moment, focusing on what you wanted to say.

“Because I was scared,” you said. 

You took a step back and began to pace the room, finding it easier to talk when you were in motion.

“Of what?” he asked. 

“Rejection,” you laughed hollowly. You managed a look at him and he seemed confused. “These past few weeks I’ve realized something,” you started. “I don’t know when it started, but now I’m quite in the middle of it and I see no way out.”

He watched you carefully still, barely moving. 

“I think… I have feelings for you, Loki,” you said. “As in… romantic feelings, far more than friendship.” You managed to meet his gaze, but the mask of confusion was still there. Had he not heard you?

He blinked, and for the first time you saw him at a loss for what to do.

“I asked you not to lie to me,” he said in a harsh whisper. 

“I’m not,” you laughed sharply.

“Is this a ploy to try to stay here?” he asked. “Thor’s not an option so you fall to me, the second choice of everyone I’ve ever known?”

“What?” It was your turn to be confused. Of all the avenues you would have thought this could go, this was not one of them. “Why would you think that?”

Loki scoffed and finally moved, taking a few steps away from you. 

“I have no reason to think otherwise,” he said.

“Not even my word?”

He hesitated, but you could see the hurt in his eyes, the fresh scars left by Hava’s betrayal.

“Loki, please,” you pleaded, taking a step towards him with your hands outstretched. But he stepped back and wouldn’t meet your gaze. 

“Please leave,” he said softly. 

Words of explanation caught in your throat. You felt your eyes start to sting with pressing tears and ran from the room. You found an alcove to cry in, just letting yourself unravel for a moment. When you had exhausted yourself, you wandered to Thor’s room and knocked pathetically at his door. You heard footsteps coming from inside the room, but you were too tired to stand so you slid down the wall and laid your head in your hands. 

It took him a moment to find the source of the knocking when he opened the door. He didn’t say anything at first, but instead slid down the wall beside you and just sat with you.

“Well, I told him,” you said finally, when you could muster it.

You felt the snot caked on your face and the swelling of your eyes. Thor only looked at you with compassion as he shook his head. 

“What happened?” he asked. 

“He didn’t believe me.”

Thor sighed and nodded. 

“I suppose that makes sense.”

“I’m not sure how to change his mind, if I even can,” you cried. “If he doesn’t trust me, he just doesn’t trust me.”

“Please be patient, dear one,” Thor said, wrapping an arm around your shoulder and pulling you against his warm body.

“How is it going convincing your father about Sif?” you asked. 

“Ah,” he said, and you could hear the smile in his voice. 

“You think he’ll go for it?” you asked, sniffling. 

“I have talked to my mother rather openly about it recently… and she believes her standing behind the decision, and with Sif saving my life… It will be no obstacle.”

You couldn’t help but grin and laugh for him, turning and wrapping your arms around your friend in a hug. 

“Fuck,” you muttered. “That’s amazing, Thor, really.”

He smiled, but his eyes were heavy.

“You must stay,” he said softly. “Even just as my honored guest. The wedding will be soon, you might as well just stay until then.”

“You already have a date?” you asked. 

“My father will be happier if he knows an heir is on the way sooner rather than later,” Thor blushed. “I assume within the month we will be wed.”

“I don’t know if I can face Loki for that long,” you said. “I can barely even think about him right now.”

“Should I talk to him?” he asked. 

“No,” you shook your head. “But thank you.”

“I believe he will come around,” Thor assured you. “Especially if you’re still here.”

You worried your lower lip with your teeth for a moment before Thor nudged you. 

“Loki feels the same,” he promised. “He just… He’s been through a lot.”

“Yeah Hava wasn’t great,” you admitted. 

“And before that,” Thor nodded. “Those kinds of scars run deep, even if he puts on a good face.”

You nodded slowly and considered that.

“I will try to stay,” you promised softly. 

“Thank you,” Thor smiled. 

“I suppose I should get some rest,” you said, feeling your eyelids drooping.

“Would you like me to walk you to your room?” he asked. 

“Carry me?” you teased. He laughed. “No,” you said. “I’m fine, thanks.”

Thor helped you up and bid you goodnight before going back into his room. You made it safely back to your bed, but Leia heard you come in and came to sit on the edge of the bed. 

“What’s wrong?” she asked. 

You realized then that you had no one to talk to about magic anymore. What Loki had said at the servants’ dance had stayed with you. Why hadn’t you trusted your longest friend? Perhaps it was time to change a few things since everything seemed to be falling apart anyway. 

“I have to tell you something,” you said.


	11. No More Secrets

The last thing you expected when you told Leia you had magic was her giant grin. 

“This is amazing!” she nearly screamed. 

You were shocked, unsure if she was serious. 

“Really? You don’t… I don’t know, think any differently of me?”

“I mean I’m furious you didn’t tell me sooner, what the hell? But other than that I’m stoked!”

“I’m sorry,” you nodded. “I just… my mother trained me from a very early age not to tell  _ anyone _ .”

“I get it,” she said. Then, after a pause, “My gran had it too.”

You perked up at this and saw the light in her eyes.    
“I always thought maybe it got passed down to me, but… no dice.”

“Maybe it did,” you shrugged. “Could be a late bloomer.”

“I doubt it,” she smiled. “So is that why you like Loki so much?” she guessed. You nodded sheepishly. 

“That’s another thing I should tell you,” you added. “I told him how I felt and he… didn’t take it well. He thought I was lying.”

She got up immediately and started heading to the door. 

“I’ll show him! Lying?!” she almost got to the door before you caught her.

“It’s fine,” you promised, though the clenching of your guts from the moment he’d rejected you assured you otherwise. “Thor said he’d probably come around, it’ll just take time… and I don’t know, I just need to convince him I guess. He invited us to stay for the wedding in a month.”

Leia huffed, but obeyed your silent command to sit back down.

“Sleep next to me tonight?” you asked. You didn’t want to be alone, and now you felt closer to her than ever. 

She nodded, not skipping a beat before burrowing under your covers.

You didn’t sleep much that night. Whenever you slipped into a light sleep, you dreamt of Loki laughing at you, or crying and yelling with rage.

What in your relationship had suggested you were untrustworthy? You wondered, perhaps unfairly, if now that he was mad at you, if he would reveal your secret. You almost wanted him to. It felt so good telling Leia. But you knew not everyone would react so kindly. 

Another thought came to you - who would teach you magic now? You’d only scratched the surface. Perhaps if you could get your hands on some books. Loki mentioned that the library didn’t house magic books but… maybe something on the fringes at least mentioned some techniques. It was a start anyway. What else would you be doing for a month until the wedding?

Making up your mind just after the sun rose, you dressed and headed to the library, leaving a sleeping Leia in your bed. 

Your mind was set for a singular task, and you didn't notice the chest in front of you until you’d bumped into it. 

Looking up, your stomach immediately dropped. 

“I’m sorry, Loki,” you managed to choke out. “I wasn’t looking--”

You saw a book in his hand and realized he hadn’t been watching where he was going either. Perhaps he too couldn’t sleep. 

You expected him to say something, to yell at you, or call you a liar again. But he didn’t. He just looked through you, as if you weren’t even there. He stepped aside and continued on his way without so much as a second glance.

Your chest felt like someone had cracked it open. You struggled to breathe for a moment, watching him walk confidently down the hallway. Somehow the absence of any sort of emotion was more of a blow than if he’d actually hit you.

Part of you wanted to run after him, try to explain yourself again to him, but you knew it would be in vain. Instead, you continued on your quest after a moment of pulling yourself back together. The library had a few books that seemed to mention a few anecdotal stories from mages, but not too much. You certainly wouldn’t learn anything from them other than the history of violence and oppression in the last few hundred years. 

Disappointed, you returned to your room. 

A few days passed in a similar manner. Thor told you of his father’s consent that he should marry Sif. That made the week a little brighter at least. You’d seen Loki in the castle, but you were careful to avoid him, turning corners and figuring out his schedule the best you could. 

One morning Leia was out, so you had the room to yourself. At least, until you heard a knock on the door. You opened the door to find Thor and Sif waiting patiently for you. 

“Come in,” you smiled. The followed you a few steps into your room. “What do I owe this pleasure?”

“We were wondering if you’d be interested in helping with the wedding setup,” Thor asked. 

“Yeah, of course,” you beamed, happy for the distraction. “What do you need?”

“We can show you, if you have the time,” he said.

“Sure,” you smiled. “Lead the way.”

You followed them out into the hallway, and walked next to Sif while Thor walked a few paces in front.

“I’ve been meaning to say thank you,” Sif said quietly. “I know everything you’ve done for him. For us. And… thank you,” she smiled. Actually smiled. She didn’t seem as threatening when she did that.

“Oh, it was nothing,” you blushed. 

“It was not nothing,” she said. “I won’t forget it.”

You followed Thor the rest of the way to a large room. There were tables the size of your bed laid out with vases, twine and paint. 

“What’s all this?” you asked. 

“A lot of the servants are busy with other tasks, so I was wondering if you’d be able to help us with this decoration,” he said. “We’re thinking of putting the twine around the vase’s neck, and then inscribing our names on the glass with paint.”

“It’s a rustic decoration used a lot where I come from originally,” Sif explained. “It would mean a lot to have them at my wedding.”

You were thinking that they weren't quite Asgardian aesthetic, but her explanation made sense. 

“That’s a lot of vases,” you muttered, stopping your count at 10 rows of 5. 

“Oh, you’ll have help,” Thor grinned wickedly. 

You were confused until you saw Loki striding through the doorway. He stopped in his tracks when he saw you and made to turn around, but Thor grabbed his brother by the shoulders and forced him over. You avoided his gaze at all costs.

“Brother, please,” he said. “I would like you to help the princess for me. You have the best handwriting of anyone in the kingdom.”

His pleading gaze seemed to melt Loki’s resolve and he rolled his eyes. 

“We’ll leave you to it then,” Thor smiled. “Shouldn’t take more than… Oh I don’t know, all day?” he grinned. He grabbed Sif’s hand who shot you an equally mischievous look before they left. 

The room was empty save for you and Loki, and neither of you made any sort of movement for a long while. 

Finally it occurred to you that had done nothing wrong. As much as he believed it, you had not lied to Loki. You’d been completely truthful and vulnerable and you wouldn't let him tell you otherwise anymore.

“Look,” you said, finally meeting his cool gaze. “I don’t take back what I said. I meant it, Loki. And I will no longer sit in fear of you when I have done nothing wrong.”

This statement seemed to startle him, though he only barely showed it.

“So just be civil to me, okay?” you asked. “I get it if you don’t believe me or whatever, but I’m going to be around until Thor’s wedding, and I plan on visiting him after that. So get used to it.”

Loki cleared his throat and seemed to calm himself a little. 

“Fine,” he said curtly. “Though I have informed my brother that he is friends with a conniving liar.”

“Fine,” you threw your hands up. “Gods this is going to take forever,” you said.

“Best get going then,” he said stiffly. 

You formed an assembly line where you wrapped the twine and kept the paint wet while Loki stenciled the glass. 

It was quiet for the first few vases before you asked what had been nagging at you. 

“What happened to Hava?” you asked. “Was she punished?”

He shot you a glance as if to say,  _ Why, wondering what your punishment should be? _

But instead answered, “She committed no real crime. I suppose her stupidity, if she believed the word of my uneducated servant about a well know magical fact, is punishment enough though.”

“Fair,” you nodded. “I’ve never heard anyone say that with such conviction. Sometimes I wish I could give magic away. I’d give it to Leia,” you said. “I told her, by the way. Not that you care I guess.”

You chanced a glance his way to see he looked pleasantly surprised. 

“Did she take it well?”

“Yes,” you nodded. “She loves it.”

He nodded, but didn't say anything. It was then that you noticed a small scrape on his cheek. 

“What happened to your face?” you asked. 

He gritted his teeth for a moment with answering before he sighed and said, “Anti-mage group jumped me outside the castle. Guards weren’t quite quick enough.”

“I bet the attackers looks a little worse than you,” you teased. And then you balked. Teasing him had felt so natural, but you saw him tense, reject the feelings of familiarity for you. 

“They do,” he answered curtly.

He suddenly stood, and with a wave of his hand and several strands of magic, the vases were wound with twine and decorated with the bride and groom’s names. You sat slack jawed at the display. Loki gave you a look you couldn't read before leaving the room.

What the hell was that? 

It gave you a little reason to hope, you realized. He could have done that initially and spared himself any sort of interaction with you, but he hadn’t. He’d stayed. But why had he left so suddenly? Perhaps he wanted to let you back in, to trust you, but it was too much for him too soon. 

You stared at the vases for a long time trying to figure him out, and were so absorbed in those thoughts that Thor’s voice made you jump.

“Done already?” he asked, sitting down next to you. 

“He just used magic,” you answered absently. “Didn’t want to be with me.”

Thor frowned. 

“I am sorry to have misled you,” he admitted. “I just thought…”

“I know,” you smiled, taking his hand. “I appreciate the effort.”

“Did he seem at all friendlier?” he asked. 

You shrugged. 

“I have no idea.”

***

When you were invited to the family dinners, you didn’t have to say much. Talk of the wedding took up most night’s conversation. You hadn’t been to town or even around the grounds of late, but the other topic of conversation had you glad you hadn’t. The anti-mage sentiments did not seem to be quieting. More graffiti and several more attacks on known or suspected mages had occurred. It was all rather grim in the face of such happiness as a wedding.

When Thor asked you if you wanted another gown for his wedding, you were pleasantly surprised.

“Go down and see Maria today and tell her what you’d like,” Thor offered. “I’ve made you a appointment. I’ll send guards with you.”

You knew he was just being cautious, but you were glad they were going with you just in case any magic did escape you somehow.

Your appointment was a little before lunch, and you walked with the guards down the streets of Asgard. It hurt to remember coming here with Loki not so long ago. Back when he didn’t think you were lying to either hurt him or help yourself.

But as you entered the shop, it was even more  déjà vu than you’d anticipated. Getting fitted in black formal robes was Loki. He heard you enter and immediately stiffened. 

“My favorite girl,” Maria greeted you warmly. It took you a moment to shake Loki’s stare. “You’ve come for another gown, no?”

“Yes,” you smiled.

“Come to the back,” she beckoned. 

Without another glance at Loki, you followed her into the back room. You could feel his eyes on you until you turned the corner to her studio. You spent a bit of time with her talking about what you’d like the dress to look like and she took some more measurements. You hoped you’d been in there long enough that Loki would be done with his appointment, but when you came back around to the front of the store, you saw he was only just wrapping up as well. 

You were considering pretending to look at some of the accessories for sale to avoid walking back with him, but decided against it. You could walk behind him or he behind you. No need to try to accommodate for him. You followed him out of the store and found the guards you’d come in with. He turned to you as if he was going to say something, but in that moment time seemed to slow down. Something had caught your eye. Something shiny and fast moving. Without thinking, you flung your magic out, clenching your fists and acting on instinct. You pushed, because for some reason, something inside of you knew that the shiny thing must not come near Loki. And then time resumed normal speed. And you saw the shocked faces of Loki, the guards, and around twenty spectators.

Confused, you looked around, and followed where Loki’s gaze led you. Sticking out of the wall you were standing next to, was a giant knife. That must have been the shining thing, you realized slowly. And it was meant for Loki. Someone had thrown it at him, and you’d deflected.

You blinked, unsure what to do. The guards swiftly moved around you, circling you while facing away from you to guard you from whomever had thrown the dagger. 

You found Loki’s attention, which perhaps should have been on the dangers around him, on you. You saw a look that couldn’t quite read.

And then you passed out.

***

Blinking, you woke up in a bright room. Several figures stood around you, but it took your vision a moment to become clear. The shapes that formed were those of Loki, Thor, Odin, Frigga, and Sif. You felt exhausted, like you’d run from your kingdom to Asgard non-stop. Your limbs felt heavy and your head felt foggy.

“Are you alright?” Thor asked, stepping forward to grab your hand. 

It took you a moment to realize you were in the healing wing. And another moment to remember why. You looked at him worriedly. 

“It’s okay,” he assured you. 

“We wish you’d told us, darling,” Frigga said. 

“We’re no strangers to protecting those with magic,” Odin nodded. “Though it will take more man power to protect another one,” he grumbled, almost to himself. Loki shot him a look. 

“I do really wish you’d told me,” Thor said. “I wish you had trusted me.”

“I didn’t trust anyone,” you tried to explain. “My mother knew, and I only just told my maid. Not even my father knows. Please,” you begged. “Do not take this as an affront to any of you. I was trained from a young age to hide it no matter what.”

They all nodded knowingly. How could they blame you, especially after what you’d just witnessed. You left out the fact that Loki also knew.

“Thank you for saving our son,” Frigga said seriously. “I am sorry it came at such a cost to you.”

You shook your head and shifted your gaze to Loki. 

“I wouldn’t have done it any differently,” you promised. He held your gaze for only a moment before turning away. 

“We are grateful,” Thor nodded. “Now, you said your father does not know. Perhaps it would be a good idea to call him here, explain yourself before word travels?”

You hadn’t even thought of that yet, but nodded. Better he hear it from you. You had no idea how he would react. The thought worried you, but you tried to put it to the back of your mind. There was nothing you could do about that when it came to it.

After a few arrangements were made, the others left, leaving only you and Loki. He watched you carefully for a moment before stepping closer.

“Are you okay?” he asked quietly. 

“What do you care?” you asked with half-hearted hostility. 

He lowered his gaze for a moment. 

“You saved my life,” he said finally. 

You hadn’t even meant to. Not consciously anyway. Consciously you hadn’t even know he was in danger. 

“Can I… try something?” he asked carefully, holding out his hands. 

Confused, you nodded and placed your hands in his as he sat on the edge of the bed. His magic felt so familiar, so comforting, you almost cried. It was like coming home. You felt his magic searching you, almost like fingers running along your skin. Then, an intense warmth overtook, and you had a surge of affection before he pulled away. 

“You were not lying,” he said quietly, almost to himself. “You do… care for me.”

You forgot to breathe for a moment. 

“How did you--”

“I can sense it through your magic. I… I should have tried it before,” he said. “But I didn’t believe it even remotely possible.” He met your gaze with a warmth you felt like you hadn’t seen in years. “But you do care for me.”

You nodded, wishing your body didn’t feel like dead weight so you could get up and hug him.

“I am so sorry for how I’ve treated you,” he said. You could feel the remorse in his magic through his touch. “When you told me that you felt… those things for me… I just… It seemed so impossible.”

You took one of your hands and cupped his cheek with it, smoothing the skin and feeling him lean into your touch. 

“Why would it be impossible?” you asked. “Did you not believe my friendship to be true?”

“I wanted it to be,” he answered. “But there are a lifetime of misfortunes that have taught me that it was improbable at the very least.”

“I must undo that teaching,” you muttered. He gave you a small smile in response.

“And after all that I have done to you… Do you still feel…” Loki trailed off, unable to meet your gaze.

“Of course, Loki, you must have felt it in my magic.”

He shook his head and smiled. 

“I just had to hear it as well,” he said. 

You sighed and relaxed back into the bed. Even if facing your father would be unpleasant, at least this part of your life was back on track. Loki reached into his bag by his side and pulled out a book. 

“Would you like to read something while you rest?” he asked. 

You considered this, but your eyes were too heavy. 

“Read to me?” you asked. 

The corner of his lip twitched upwards and he nodded, opening the book. He moved his chair closer to you, entwining the unburdened hand with yours, letting a calming feeling flow through his magic to you. 

He read to you in a low, quiet, voice, but it didn’t put you to sleep. You longed to hear his soothing voice reading to you, telling you of adventure and mystery. He read to you for a little over an hour before you started drifting. He chuckled when you startled back awake after slipping into sleep a few times. Giving up, he stood, kissed your forehead and left you to rest.

The next morning you were well enough to leave the wing, and Loki was there to escort you to your room. You weren’t sure how he knew you’d be let out this morning, but guessed he’d asked to be notified. It was still strange how he didn’t look at you with contempt now. You’d gotten used to the idea of him being mad at you forever, but it had passed so quickly. 

Loki was with you a few hours later when word had come that your father was arriving the next day per your request. 

“How do I tell him?” you asked, your stomach clenching. Loki took your hand as you walked the sun-soaked grounds. 

“Just say it,” he suggested. “Don’t beat around the bush.”

“I have magic,” you practiced. “Sorry I hid it from you my whole life?”

Loki sighed and nodded. 

“More or less,” he said. “There’s no other way.”

“I guess,” you sighed. “I wonder if he’ll hate me.”

Loki took the hand he was holding to his lips and placed a gentle kiss there. 

“I can be there if it is of any help,” he said, and you could feel the support through your magic.

“Yes,” you nodded. “I think it would help to have someone else there. Maybe if he sees you, sees how powerful and masterful you are, he won’t be… I don’t know scared or disgusted by me.”

“I don’t think he could be either of those things,” Loki promised. 

“My mother must have hidden her magic from him for a reason,” you said. 

“Try not to worry, luv,” he said softly. “We will deal with it as it comes.”

The  _ we _ sounded so natural coming from him, but it still felt foreign to you. Still, it was nice to hear, even if it would take time to get used to hearing it again.

***

You waited in a small reception room while your father was greeted and brought into the palace. Loki insisted on staying with you despite your attempts to assure him that you were fine. Your magic buzzed beneath your skin, even with Loki’s attempts at calming you through his magic. 

A knock on the door had you standing at attention. Your father entered with a smile. He glanced at Loki and looked somewhat confused. You greeted him with a hug and a kiss. 

“My darling daughter,” he smiled. 

“Dad,” you managed. “And this is Prince Loki, obviously,” you smiled. 

“Pleasure,” your father said. Loki nodded his returned sentiments. “So, I thought you might have brought me here for happy news of an engagement,” he said. “But I assume that is not the case,” he said, eyes darting to and from Loki.

“No,” you agreed, taking a seat on the loveseat next to Loki. Your father took a seat in the chair opposite. “I don’t know how to tell you this but… I have magic,” you said, not meeting his gaze. “I always have and I’m sorry for hiding it but--”

“Magic?” you father said in an unreadable tone. 

“She’s very gifted,” Loki interjected.

You searched your father’s face for clues as to how he was receiving this news, but found none.

“Magic,” he repeated. “And you’re sure?”

“Yes,” you laughed uncomfortably. 

You could see the wheels turning in your father’s head, but weren’t sure in what direction they went.

“And everyone knows?” he asked. “There’s no way we could mask this? Pretend like you don't have it?”

You and Loki both froze. This wasn’t a reaction you’d anticipated. You’d thought he’d either accept you completely or disown you immediately. 

“No,” you said cautiously. “I don’t want to hide anymore. I’m ready to be out there, educating people and making them see that people with magic are not to be feared.”

“But we could say that you had pulled some kind of stunt,” your father continued. “That it was just a joke.”

“No,” you interjected. “I have magic and I’m ready to go public with that fact.”

“But--” your father started. 

“Sir, your daughter is a powerful, gifted, mage,” Loki said. “And whether or not you accept her is up to you, but this is what she stands for now. So you can either get behind her or get out of her way.”

The resoluteness of this statement filled you up, making you feel more powerful.

“Of course,” he said quietly, though you were unsure he was convinced. “May I have a moment alone with my daughter?” he asked Loki. 

Loki looked at you for approval and you nodded. He silently left the room with one glance backwards at the threshold.

When you were alone, the room seemed smaller. Your father came closer and took your hands in his. 

“How are you?” he asked. The question took you off your guard. “How are you doing with all of this?”

“I’m okay,” you promised. “Mom told me to hide it for a long time, and I think she was right--”

“Your mother knew?” he asked. 

“She… had it too,” you said. 

He hung his head and shook it like he should have known.

“And Thor?” he asked. “I hear he is engaged to someone else.”

“Thor is a dear friend,” you promised. “I am welcome here as long as I wish. And I believe it would be best that I stay here for two reasons. One, that this kingdom is a little more welcoming than ours for mages,” you said. 

“And two?” he asked. 

“And two…” you hesitated, but continued. “Two… I have feelings for Loki that I would like to explore.”

“So a marriage is still possible…” your father muttered, mainly to himself. 

You chuckled. 

“I suppose so,” you acknowledged. “Though I promise no such thing.”

Your father looked at you then with such love.

“I am glad you have found yourself here,” he said sincerely. You wondered if it had been Loki’s little speech that had swayed him so quickly. 

“Me too,” you smiled. 

After a few more moments of catching up with what else had transpired here, and what was going on at home, you emerged from the room to find Loki standing close by. Your father smiled at him and not-so-inconspicuously gave him a once over.

“I will return for the wedding, as Thor asked,” he said. Thor must have asked him the minute he got here, you realized. “But until then…”

“I will keep her safe,” Loki promised, seemingly reading your father’s mind. 

You were going to interject, to say that you could keep yourself safe, but you didn’t. You saw the connecting being made between the men and let it happen.

You bid goodbye to your father that evening and watched him get back into his carriage. 

“If only the whole kingdom were that easy,” you muttered, watching the carriage roll away. 

“Mm,” Loki agreed distractedly.    
“What?” you asked. He stalled for a moment in uncharacteristic surprise, but soon recovered. 

“Why don’t we figure out how to do that?” he asked. “To teach the kingdom and subsequently the world, not to fear magic?”

You weren’t sure if he were serious. Seeing your hesitation, he continued. 

“It’s like you said the fist night we met. People are stupid, but if we can get to them one at a time, educate them… then maybe we can make a difference.”

You couldn’t help the wide smile that came over your face. 

“It’s a plan,” you said.


	12. Reclamation

Unsurprisingly, after you and Loki had reconciled, Thor and Sif didn’t need your help with the wedding at all. There were no more crafts or decorations to be made that the servants “were too busy for” as they had been before. You knew you owed a lot to Thor. If he hadn’t sent you to Maria’s, Loki would be at least severely injured if not dead, and he wouldn’t have read your magic revealing the truth.

It was a beautiful warm morning that you decided to go to the library to gather some books for the week. Upon reaching the giant doors to the library, you saw Loki. He seemed to be waiting for something, and when he saw you, he smiled. 

“I thought I might find you here,” he said. 

“You could have also found me in my room,” you chuckled. 

“I wasn’t sure when you’d wake up,” he blushed. “But I knew you’d come here when you did.”

“Stalking me?” you teased. 

Loki’s lips twitched into a quick smirk. 

“I was wondering if you’d do me the honor of dinner tonight,” he said carefully. 

Your heart sped up in your chest and you felt delightfully woozy.

“Like a date?” you asked sheepishly. 

For the first time, you saw him look a little nervous and realized he thought you might say no.

“Yes,” he answered cautiously. 

“Good,” you smiled, watching his shoulders relax at your response. “Until then shall we go explore the library?”

“I must attend to some matters,” he frowned. “But I will be by this evening around seven to pick you up?”

“And where are we dining? Just so I know what to wear.”

“I thought a picnic might be nice,” he said. “Do you remember the tree we visited with Hava?”

He chuckled at the face you made. 

“I know,” he nodded. “But that is a favorite spot of mine and I’d very much like to unsully its memory.”

You smiled at the idea.

“Alright,” you nodded. “I like that.”

“I’ll see you tonight,” Loki smiled excitedly. He quickly kissed your cheek before heading off, leaving you blushing profusely.

You wandered the library aimlessly, really just thinking about your date for the evening before focusing on what you wanted to read. 

An actual date with Loki. The more you thought about it, the more that tree made sense. You could start over with him, rewrite the treacherous past that haunted you both. And you were excited to see it at night. You were betting the view would be great without all the light from the castle. Though of course you would have to be escorted by a few armed guards… but that was your new reality. It hadn’t really hit you, as you hadn’t been outside the palace, but this was it. Your life was infinitely more dangerous now. Besides a few side glances from the servants and various nobles, you hadn’t felt the difference too much. But you would soon, you were sure of it.

Now, with purpose, you realized the kinds of books you wanted to read. You found some books on writing persuasively and clearly, hoping it might help you persuade people that magic was nothing to be feared.

You also gathered some fiction as well to balance it out and horded them all back to your room. You studied and read for most of the day, breaking for lunch with Leia and an afternoon stroll with Thor. 

“I hear you have a date tonight,” Thor smirked. 

“How did you hear that?” you asked. 

“Loki may have mentioned it a few times,” he chuckled.

You blushed. So he was as excited about it as you were.

“Do me a favor,” Thor asked, stopping your stroll to look at you seriously. “Take care of him.”

“What do you mean?” you asked. “If anything he’s taking care of me, I’m the newby to magic.”

“Yes, but he’s the newby to… trusting, to falling in love for real.”

You blinked, processing that. 

“I am also new to those things,” you admitted. “I am not sure I can--”

“You can,” Thor promised. “Do not let him run away.”

“I won’t,” you smiled softly. “And will you promise me something in return?”

“Anything,” he nodded.

“Never stop being my friend,” you said with a playful smile. 

He laughed, having expected something far more serious.   
“I can promise that with absolute certainty.”

***

Getting ready for your date was making you more anxious than you’d anticipated. Your stomach was in knots and you were obsessing over one curl that wouldn’t fall the way you wanted. 

“You’re so fucking nervous,” Leia laughed, coming over from her spot on the couch to help you with your hair. She fixed it immediately.

“I know,” you groaned. “I don’t know why. Nothing’s changed. We’re the same as before, really.”

“You’re not though,” she said. “Before there was mystery, excitement. But now… you both know you like each other so… It’s just awkward.”

“It’s not awkward,” you laughed. “I’m just awkward.”

“Well duh,” she said. “But it’s also just how these things go.”

“And you’d know?” you laughed. She kicked you playfully.

“I know some stuff,” she answered pridefully.

“What have you been up to in this palace while I’m busy?” you teased, not expecting her to react. She blushed profusely. “Oh my gods, you’ve been holding out on me. What happened?”

She rolled her eyes and took a seat next to you. 

“I didn’t want to say anything until it was… official, but… I found someone.”

“Who?!” you nearly screamed. 

“His name is Theo,” she grinned. “He’s one of Thor’s soldiers.”

“Oh shit,” you muttered. If they married, she definitely wouldn't be your maid anymore. In a way, that made you happy, though you hated the thought of not seeing her every day.

“Are you… happy for me?” she asked. 

In response you made your magic create mini fireworks in front of her. She gazed in wonderment and smiled. 

“I guess so,” she grinned.

“Remember when we said that we felt like we belonged here, we just didn’t know where?” you asked. “I feel like we’ve figured it out.”

She nodded. Then there was a knock at the door. 

“Your date has arrived,” she grinned. 

Your stomach twisted and you stood to go answer the door after one more glance in the mirror. Opening it, you saw Loki dressed in a comfortable but flattering outfit with a nervous smile on his face. 

“My apologies, I’m a little early,” he said. 

“It’s okay, I’m ready,” you promised. 

He smiled and let out a little relieved sigh.

“Shall we then?” he asked, holding out his hand to you. 

With a glance back at Leia to see her smile and nod her goodbye, you took Loki’s hand and followed him to the stables. It was a warm night, and the ride to the tree was pleasant, though you didn’t speak much. Your guards followed at a respectable distance, but you weren’t sure who would attack you in the middle of nowhere. 

You made it to the tree and unpacked your dinner. Loki laid out a large, comfortable, blanket and several large pillows to lean against. He laid out plates and the two of you quickly filled them, though the silence remained. 

You suddenly couldn’t think of anything to say. Leia was right. It was just awkward now that everything was out in the open. You glanced at Loki a few times, but he seemed to busy himself with looking everywhere except you.

Finally, you couldn’t take it anymore. 

“Is this weird?” you asked. 

This caught Loki by surprise. He had to stop himself from choking on his sip of wine.

“Is it?” he asked after swallowing. 

Maybe it hadn’t been, and you just made it weird.

“No, it is,” he nodded after a moment. “It’s a little strange.”

“Why?” you asked, moving closer to him. You put your hand on top of his and felt your magics melding together. They seemed so at harmony, so compatible.

He turned your hand over in his and gazed at it. 

“I think… we both know where this is heading, and we’re scared,” he said carefully. “It’s more than either of us has ever experienced before.”

“It’s a lot to risk,” you echoed. He nodded in agreement. “Do you… Do you want to--”

In response, Loki kissed you. He pulled you to him desperately, and your entire body went on fire. You moved swiftly to get closer to him, straddled him as you pressed yourself against him. You could feel your magics converging, playing, touching. It was intoxicating.

You only pulled away when you thought you might pass out from the feeling. Remaining on his lap, he smiled up at you, pushing a few stray hairs behind your ear.

“Yes,” he said finally. “I do want to risk it.”

You smiled foolishly and slipped off his lap, but remained close to him.

“Have we reclaimed this spot enough for you?” you teased. 

Loki looked at the old tree. It was mangled and weathered, lonely and timeless. He thought about something for a moment before moving his hand up and around, as if gesturing to the tree. As he did, it seemed to spring up with new life. Leaves formed out of nowhere, vines grew around the trunk, and moss sprouted by your blanket. You watched in utter awe before turning to look at him. He wasn't even looking at what he’d just created. He was looking at you.

“You have to teach me to do that,” you marveled. 

“It’s just an illusion,” he smiled softly. “Not real life.”

“Still,” you smiled, watching as the illusion wavered and regained its form after you ran your hand through it. You turned your attention to him. “You’re so talented,” you said seriously. “So talented and… artful, almost.”

Loki chuckled. 

“You’re too kind,” he said. 

“No, I’m serious,” you said, not trusting that he’d actually trust anything you said to him. 

You touched him and pushed the feeling through your magic to him. You were right, based on the surprised expression that came over him. He hadn’t believed you.

“Now tell me,” you said. “Were you lying when we first met? What is our connection? It’s not normal is it? You don’t feel like this or even close to this with other mages, do you?”

“Ah,” he smiled mischievously. “No. Though that was also a lie to myself at the time.”

“Why?” you asked, before answering yourself, “Hava.”

He nodded. 

“I didn’t know what I was supposed to feel with someone before you. She came along, she was nice, shared the same interests… but then I met you, and I didn’t want to have those feelings, to complicate everything. Especially when I thought you might want Thor.”

“I could never want Thor as anything other than a brother,” you promised.

“Well, you certainly made a go of it in the beginning,” he shrugged. “So I wasn’t sure.”

You nodded. You had tried.

“Did you know my maid is dating one of Thor’s soldiers?” you smiled. 

“No,” he laughed. “Both of you are settling in here then,” he said.

“I honestly can’t imagine leaving Asgard,” you admitted. 

There was a silence there with an unspoken understanding. You had just started on this thing, there was no reason to talk of marriage soon, but you had put it out there at least. You had let him know, through your words and through your still-touching hands that you were serious. You would move here permanently for him if he wanted you to.

You didn’t say much more as you snuggled and ate by the tree. It was an easy silence now, though, and you felt at peace. You thought you could stay there forever.    
But eventually your eyes got tired, and before you were too sleepy to ride, the two of you returned to the castle. Loki walked you to your bedroom door. 

“This is the part where I would have kissed you goodnight,” he smirked. 

“Mmmm, you still can,” you smiled, leaning up on tiptoe. 

You met his cool lips with your own and were somehow still surprised at the shock your magic felt. Not only was Loki like one of its own, he was part of it. It was like your magic had been split in two and separated into each of you, only now, when you were touching, when you were close, did it feel whole. 

Pulling away and closing your eyes, you fought the urge to invite him in. The thought of being with him was tempting, but you didn’t want to rush it either. 

“Goodnight, my princess,” he said softly, reading you through your magic. 

“Goodnight, my prince,” you echoed. “Thank you for tonight.”

He slipped a finger under your chin and kissed you gently one last time. Breaking the kiss, he stayed close to you, his eyes closed, just for a breath, before stepping away. 

You made your way into your room, closing the door and leaning on it for a moment to collect yourself. 

“You look flustered,” Leia laughed. She was sitting on your bed eating ice cream out of a container. 

“Give me some of that,” you smiled. 

“Tell me everything,” she said. 


	13. Two Gifts

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> It was about time for a pun. Sorry in advance :)

“Hot springs?” you asked. “Didn’t take you for a swimmer.”

Loki rolled his eyes playfully and squeezed your hand as you walked along the halls. 

“They’re quite relaxing,” he promised. And then without warning, he pinned you against the wall, his hand by your head. “And quite private,” he whispered, sending shivers down your spine.

“Brother!” you heard Thor bellow from down the hallway. Loki rolled his eyes and moved, releasing you from the wall. “How are you both?” he asked genially. 

Loki made to grumble something, but you assured Thor you were both well. 

“We’re headed to the hot springs,” you explained. 

“Oh lovely. Perhaps afterwards you will join me and my lady for dinner?”

You glanced at Loki who shrugged as if to say it were up to you. 

“We’d love to,” you said. 

“Great!” Thor clapped his hands thunderously. 

He bid you goodbye until then, leaving you and Loki alone again. 

“Now, where were we?” he asked hungrily. 

“What has gotten into you today?” you giggled, pushing him playfully as he pressed himself against you again. 

He bit his lip as he looked at you. 

“Something in my magic… You’ve awoken something,” he said. Then, as he gently caressed your cheek with his finger he asked, “Is it too much?”

“No,” you promised. “Should we go get changed and meet by the gate?”

“Yes,” he smiled. 

You did as you had suggested and met Loki at the gates of the palace that led to the hot springs. You didn’t have to go far outside the palace walls, but the guards accompanied you anyway.

When you got to the hot springs, you felt the heat coming off the small ponds with the wind. The steam rose around them and you took a moment to breathe it in. The grass beneath your toes was a little soggy, and you heard the ground squelch as you took off your cover-up. Loki stripped of his shirt, and you each assessed the other. You’d not seen him without his shirt on other than a brief encounter in his room with Hava when Thor was hurt. 

You flinched at the memory, and Loki’s face contorted into concern.

“What?” he asked. And you realized he thought you might be repulsed by him. 

“It’s not you,” you promised with a small laugh. “I was just thinking of something unpleasant.”

He reached for your hand and searched your mind. You let him. He saw the image you’d seen when you opened the door - Hava naked in his bed, Loki’s wild hair, the smell of…

He pulled away abruptly. 

“I’m sorry,” he said. 

“You have nothing to apologize for,” you muttered.

Loki pulled you closer to him, tucking your head under his chin as he hugged you. 

“I wish I had never met her,” he said. “I’ve never met anyone like you, anyone that makes me feel more alive, less alone,” he explained. 

“Me either,” you promised. 

“Let’s forget her,” he said. “Like the tree. We’ll reclaim this entire kingdom if we have to,” he said with a small smirk. 

And when he kissed you then, you felt how much he meant it. He only wanted you, wished he had never know anyone else.

“Should we?” you asked, glancing at the waiting water.

He nodded and followed you in. It wasn’t a large pool, but big enough for the two of you to swim around in freely. Near where you’d entered there were large, smooth, rocks to sit on, allowing most of your body to remain submerged. You alternated swimming and resting, chatting easily. You liked watching his body move in the water. When he floated on his back he seemed so at peace. 

“Are you dreading dinner?” you asked when you were both sitting on the large rock. 

You leaned against Loki’s chest as he played with your hair, resting his elbow on the side of the pool. 

“I always dread time that I must share you with others,” he sighed. You chuckled, but he seemed surprised. “You don’t believe me?” he asked. 

“Oh no, I do,” you answered. “Though I do not know why you feel that way. Especially your brother. He’s so nice.”

“I suppose,” he allowed. 

“Bet there’s a lot of history though,” you said, remembering what Thor had said about Loki’s trust issues running deeper than Hava.

“Oh yes,” Loki nodded. 

“It seems to me he would do anything for you,” you suggested, touching his hand to allow him to feel that you meant it. “He loves you more than you think,” you promised. Loki let out a tired sigh. 

“Is this your life’s ambition?” he asked. “To persuade me that people care for me?”

“Yes,” you said, turning and smiling up at him. This eared you a forehead kiss. “I’m getting pruney,” you lamented finally.

He chuckled softly and followed your lead to get out of the pool. It was close enough to dinner time that you both separated to get ready for dinner. Leia had left a note saying she was off with Theo for the night, so you got dressed alone. You thought about what Loki would have said about your maid abandoning you with no warning for the night and laughed. She had never been your maid, not really. And you were glad she was finding happiness here, that she was growing and finding a world outside of you. And that you were doing the same. 

You took your time on your walk to one of the smaller dining halls. It would just be the four of you this evening, and Thor didn’t want to bother with a larger room than was necessary. Still, the opulence of the castle never ceased to amaze you, as even the smaller dining halls had ceilings that were taller than some trees.

You were the first to arrive, but Loki soon joined you, his hands behind his back as he approached. 

“You look lovely as always,” you greeted him. 

“And you,” he smiled. “Although I was hoping I might be able to add to that…”

He revealed what he’d been hiding behind his back. It was a small box. Your heart leapt. He opened it slowly revealing an emerald necklace. The gold chain was thin and shimmered in the light. The stone was the perfect size, not too big, and set in a gold border. 

“What’s this for?” you asked, grinning. 

“Just because,” he said. “May I?” he asked, holding the necklace up while he pocketed the box. 

You nodded and swept your hair out of the way for him to sweep the necklace around you. It laid perfectly above the neckline of your dress. He fastened it and you turned to him. 

“It’s beautiful, Loki, thank you,” you said. 

He merely took your hand and kissed it.

“Good evening,” you heard Sif’s voice from down the hall. 

“Hello, friends!” Thor bellowed. He gestured to the servant waiting in the wings and they began bringing out the first course. “Come, come, let’s eat, I am starving.”

You watched Sif’s loving smile and were surprised that such a strong, seemingly calculating woman would fall for what amounted to a large puppy. Still, you could see the love in her gaze, in her touch, and couldn’t help feeling overwhelming happiness for them.

You sat across from the couple, while Loki sat on your left. The first course was a salad, but Thor treated it as though his wine were the starter.

“How were the springs?” Sif asked.

“Very nice, very relaxing,” you smiled. “Did you do anything exciting today?”

“More wedding planning and various other time consuming activities,” Thor relayed. 

“A month is not much time to plan,” you admitted. 

“It feels like a year,” Sif laughed delicately. “I wish we were married already.”

“You know she and my brother were the only ones who knew we were involved,” Thor smiled at Sif. “Perceptive couple, are they not?”

“Very,” Sif agreed. 

“It was obvious to me,” you laughed. “Feelings that don’t involve me are always easily detectable,” you admitted. “Those directed at me… not so much. I’m blind there.”

“Well, know that we love you,” Thor smiled. And, looking to his brother he added, “And don’t think I don’t know you are similarly affected, brother. Know that I love you dearly too.”

Loki shifted uncomfortably in his chair, at which Thor merely laughed, but you took the moment to take Loki’s hand under the table while laughing and putting your hand on Thors. Guiding your magic to become a conduit, you tried to channel Thor’s feelings to Loki. You watched Loki’s face carefully and saw that it must have worked, for he wore a similar look of surprise to when you’d shown him your feelings.

Letting Thor’s hand go while he was none the wiser of what had happened, you kept your other hand in Loki’s. He gave it a little squeeze, and you shared a look completely separate of the other two.

The rest of the dinner passed uneventfully, with most of the talk centering around the wedding. You were excited for them, but by dessert you were ready to call it a night. 

“Won’t you come have a drink with us?” Thor asked, as the last of the plates had been cleared away. 

“Oh no, I think I’m just going to take a short walk and head to bed,” you said. 

“Would you like company?” Loki asked, his voice low and soothing. 

You nodded and saw Thor and Sif exchange a look. 

“Well, enjoy your midnight stroll,” Thor smiled. “Goodnight, dear ones.”

You bid him goodnight and followed Loki out into the garden. The night was exceptionally dark. The moon was almost completely hidden by clouds, but the garden was illuminated with lamps.

“What did you think of dinner?” Loki asked, as you walked hand in hand through the lush garden. 

“I was going to ask you the same thing,” you said seriously. “Did it work?”

“Your little conduit spell?” Loki asked. “Yes, and don't think I wasn’t impressed.”

“Spell?” you asked. “I just--”

“You’re more powerful than you realize,” Loki said. “Not many mages can simply  _ will _ their magic to do their bidding untrained as you seem to do.”

“I would like to be trained,” you said. “If you’re still up for it.”

“I am,” he nodded. 

“But you didn’t answer my question,” you said pointedly.

Loki looked at the sky for a moment considering his answer.

“I was surprised,” he said. “I knew he… cared for me in his own way, but I didn’t know if was so deeply.”

“And do you care for him the same way?” you asked. 

Loki looked almost guilty and didn’t quite meet your gaze. 

“I have no allowed myself to,” he answered finally.

“I’m sorry you’ve had to live like this,” you said. 

“I’m sorry  _ you’ve _ had to live like this,” he countered. 

You smiled sadly and squeezed his hand. 

“I wouldn’t have been able to be this happy without you,” you said. “Allowing myself to be free with my magic, to trust that those who love me will stay… It’s the best gift anyone could give me,” you said. Then, touching your pendant, you joked, “Aside from this.”

“I--” he started, but the skies opened up and it began to pour. 

You realized those had been storm clouds covering the moon, and laughed wildly while you ran with Loki for cover inside the palace. Your running was of no use, you were both completely soaked. Once you had both stopped laughing, which took some time, you smoothed back Loki’s hair, clearing his face. You stopped, your hand tangled in his hair, and pulled him to you. His wet lips found yours and your magic ignited. 

You stumbled breathlessly, wordlessly, to your room. You didn’t need to say anything, you communicated through the shared stream of your magics.

You shed your wet clothes, breaking your kiss and touch only to look at each other for a split second before coming together again. 

Loki was gentler than you’d anticipated. He was loving and careful, while you clung to him desperately, wanting to be closer and closer. 

As you lay together afterwards, your magics resting like old dogs at the end of the bed, he played with your hair as you laid your head on his chest.

“Seeing you in that necklace… in  _ only _ that necklace… is quite intoxicating,” Loki hummed. 

“I’ll remember that,” you chuckled.

It wasn’t long until you drifted into a peaceful sleep.


	14. Together Against the World

By the week of the wedding a few weeks later, you and Loki were nearly inseparable. You’d more or less moved into his room, and Leia wasn’t mad about having some privacy with her man either, as you’d given her free reign of your room. 

Everyone probably knew of the situation, as you’d been seen many times come and going from Loki’s room both with and without him at all hours of the day. Still, no one seemed to care. Sometimes you thought you might be moving a little fast, or that you might be spending too much time together, but you tried to balance it with time alone when he had things to do, and with Thor and Sif.

You found that after you’d been intimate, he wanted to be touching you in some way all the time. Whether it was holding your hand, standing behind you with his hands on your hips, or even just running his fingers through your hair as you laid your head on his lap to read, he was always there. And you loved it. His touch had an effect on your magic that did not seem to fade with time. Whatever one was feeling, the other would feel it when touched. Most of the time it was arousal or admiration from him, but more often than not you calmed him while he was with his family, or sent him reassurances when you could tell he needed it.

Your magical connection had been strengthened as you continued to train with Loki as well. It was like building a muscle. Over time it got stronger. You learned everything from illusions to healing magic, and you couldn’t have been more excited about it. It just felt right to use your magic after so long of bottling it up.

When you weren’t otherwise engaged, you had started creating a sort of campaign for the surrounding villages. Loki had helped you get in contact with a few sympathetic printers who helped you make pamphlets and signs encouraging people to learn more about magic, that it wasn’t to be feared. You weren’t sure if it would help, but you had to do something. The people of this kingdom didn’t increase their violence once they learned of your powers, but neither did they decrease it. Incidents were still happening, and the guards were with you whenever you left the palace. You were sure you’d seen a few lurking around near you when you weren’t with Loki too. You were sure he’d asked them to keep an eye on you when you were alone, and you weren’t mad about it. 

You’d gone to Maria for your wedding attire, and she once again matched your gown to Loki’s outfit. It was lucky dark green looked good on you. And as she was making the final touches to the dress as you stared at yourself in the mirror, she smiled. 

“I told you with the first dress, eh?” she asked. 

“What?” you asked. 

“I asked you to thank me by falling in love in that dress. And you did, didn’t you?” she asked with a playful glance at Loki who was with her assistant across the shop.

You blushed and let out an embarrassed laugh. 

“I think I did,” you nodded. 

You hadn’t said those exact words out loud to Loki, but you’d both certainly felt it through your magic.

“Well, you could not have chosen better,” Maria assured you. “He’s a good boy.”

You locked eyes with Loki across the room and he smiled softly. 

“He is,” you nodded.

“And you make beautiful babies,” she smiled. 

You stuttered into a laugh and shook your head. 

“You’re always ahead of me,” you warned her. 

“Ah,” she shrugged. “All in good time.”

She finished on your dress and stepped away. 

“Another masterpiece,” she said. 

“Indeed,” Loki agreed as he walked over. 

“It’s a beautiful dress,” you smiled. 

“I wasn’t talking about the dress,” Loki winked. Maria hit him playfully in the arm. 

***

Getting dressed for the wedding was hard, because everytime you got your dress on, Loki wanted to take it off. You convinced him you’d have plenty of time for that tonight, and he finally got ready with you.

You stopped by your old room to visit Leia before heading to the grand hall where the wedding would take place. She gushed over your gown and tried not to mess up your hair when she hugged you.

The decorations for the wedding were beautiful. You spotted the vases that Thor had tricked you into making with Loki and smiled. The whole hall was covered in vibrant flowers. There was plenty of seating, but the front row was reserved for you, Odin, Frigga, and Sif’s parents.

The wedding was, of course, perfect. Listening to Thor and Sif exchange their vows was interesting. You were unsurprised by Thor’s openness and appreciation of Sif, but you hadn’t heard her be so vulnerable before. It was refreshing, and heartwarming. 

You held Loki’s hand through the ceremony and could feel the harmony of your magics. While marriage wasn’t as important to you as it was to your parents, you both knew that despite a ceremony, you’d still be together forever. You wondered if it was healthy to think that so early on in your relationship, but something about him just made you so sure. You’d never been so sure of anything.

You could feel through his magic that he felt the same certainty, a feeling you knew was as alien to him as it was to you.

The ceremony wasn’t obnoxiously lengthy, and before long you were gathered at tables, feasting and laughing. You got to see your father, though he seemed more interested in talking with the king and queen than you. That suited you fine, as you didn’t care for any more interrogation about your magic.

Thor and Sif’s first dance was wonderful to watch. They were perfectly in tune, moving together as one person. When others were encouraged to join in the dancing, you took Loki’s hand and tried not to step on his toes. 

Out of breath after a few dances, you pulled him to the side of the room. 

“Drinks?” Loki asked. 

“My feet hurt,” you laughed. “Do you mind if you get them? I just want to sit down for a moment.”

He nodded and kissed your forehead before heading off across the vast ballroom to get your a drink. You hadn’t been sitting long when a handsome man came up to you. 

“Could I interest you in a dance?” he asked. 

“Oh, I’m with someone,” you smiled. “Thank you though.”

He nodded and left after bowing slightly. But he wasn’t the only one. Another man came up and asked the same thing. You stood, looking for Loki, but you didn’t see him. Instead, you felt an arm wrap posessively around your waist, and noticed he was suddenly beside you. 

“She’s with me,” Loki said venomously to the gentleman.

The man looked absolutely terrified, and you were scared to look at the fire that must be in Loki’s eyes right now.

You pressed your hand to his chest as the man ran away, and tried to calm him. You could feel the possessiveness through your magic. He didn’t even want anyone to look at you.

“I was going to say no, just as I did the other one,” you promised. 

He turned to you quickly and said, “The other one?”

You chuckled and shook your head. 

“Relax,” you said, sending soothing vibes through your magic. “I only have eyes for you tonight. And every other night,” you said. “Where are the drinks?” you asked.

“I, erm, sort of left them over there when I saw him talking to you,” Loki said.

He relaxed a little, but you saw his eyes darting around the room for potential threats as your dance partner. He only found one, but smiled as his brother approached with his new wife. 

“Congratulations, brother,” he said warmly. 

Thor nodded and beamed at him. 

“We were wondering if we could have a dance,” Thor asked, motioning that Sif would dance with Loki, and you with him. 

You glanced at Loki, but it seemed his brother was the only one he trusted with you, for he nodded and joined Sif on the dance floor. You took Thor’s extended hand and started the next dance with him.

“So, how does it feel?” you asked. 

“I think my cheeks will hurt tomorrow from all this smiling,” he laughed. 

“I’m glad it all worked out,” you nodded. “I wasn’t so sure in the beginning. I suppose it could have been us at that alter today.”

He smiled warmly at you. 

“I think we have both found much better suited partners,” he said, glancing at Loki. You could only guess what he and Sif were discussing as they danced. 

“I agree,” you chuckled. 

“I assume we will have another wedding soon,” Thor suggested. 

“Oh, no,” you laughed. “I’m not rushing into anything. I’m not… Well, my father cares more about all that than I do. I just… want to be with him.”

“I was right about you,” Thor said. “I knew you were the one for him. Hava… She was so clearly after something. Our family is fortunate, and we have much to be thankful for. And much that is coveted. But you… you just love my brother.”

You blushed violently and couldn’t meet his gaze. 

“Is that what you were thinking that first day when we went to The Great Lake?” you asked. “That I would end up with Loki?”

He chuckled softly and nodded. 

“I have known for some time. Loki is not the only perceptive one.”

“I guess not,” you laughed. 

“Though,” Thor said, his voice lower, “Loki is not as perceptive when it comes to matters of the heart. Please be clear with him,” he said. “He cannot fathom things that seem very obvious to us.”

You sighed, knowing exactly what he meant and wondering if you were doing enough to assure him. Just when you thought you’d met your last dance partner for the night, Odin interrupted your dance. 

“May I?” he asked you, glancing at Thor. His son nodded and stepped aside. You acquiesced as well with a nod.   
Odin took a respectable stance with you, his one hand high on your back, his other firmly placed in yours. It was strange, for you’d never been this close to the king before. You saw up close all the wrinkles from many night of worry and many days of laughter.

“It was a beautiful ceremony,” you said, sensing there was a reason he has asked to dance with you. “Thank you for allowing me to stay until today.”

“You are a most welcome guest,” Odin assured you. “I know what you did for my son, that you knew of his feelings for his bride. While I don’t enjoy the deceit, I do acknowledge and encourage such selflessness.” You weren’t sure what to say, but he continued. “And I know that you have only ever been a good friend to that son… But I know you and Loki…” he trailed off with uncharacteristic mischief in his eyes. 

“I would understand if that would seem untoward,” you admitted. “I promise I am not jumping from son to son as they become available.”

“I know,” Odin laughed. “And while Thor may be my blood, Loki is still important to me. Though he may believe otherwise.”

You couldn’t quite meet his gaze there, not knowing if he really did care for Loki. 

“I see the change you have created in him,” Odin said. “And I believe it to be a good match. I just want you to know, you are welcome in my kingdom as long you as please.”

You looked at him then and saw a very wise look. You saw where Thor had gotten that from. 

“Thank you,” you replied earnestly. “I do love it here. I feel safe, despite everything that’s happened. And I… I do love your son,” you said.

It was really the first time you’d admitted it, the depth of your feelings for him. You’d always thought one day you’d love him, that had been too soon. But you knew now. And really, you’d always known.

Odin smiled softly as the band finished the song. Everyone clapped, and soon you felt Loki’s hand wrap around your waist. Odin smiled at you and nodded as he slipped away to find his wife, or perhaps, some mead.

“What have you been chatting about?” Loki asked, kissing your temple.

You smiled and turned to him, grabbing his hands in yours. Pulling him gently out into the empty hallway, you stood with the light from the hall spilling onto his handsome face.

“I should say this, Loki, these words I’ve been feeling for some time,” you said, feeling your heart rage against your ribcage. “I love you.”

You made sure you had a firm hold of his hands when you said this, and that your magic was pushing your feelings through your hands.

You thought he might run, might scowl and accuse you of lying again, but he didn’t. He held your hands, closed his eyes, absorbed your magic, and smiled peacefully. 

“I love you too,” he breathed, opening his eyes at last. 

You kissed him gently, pulling him against the wall, away from all the festivities just yards away. It was just the two of you out here. It was just the two of you always. Together against the world. No matter what.

He smoothed a stray hair back from your face as he pulled away. 

“I love you,” he repeated, almost to himself, his eyes full of wonder. 

Eventually, you were unsure how much time you’d spent staring at each other, you were discovered by Thor and pulled back into the festivities. 

You danced, and drank, and were merry with the rest of them, but you and Loki were still in your own world together. While everyone was lovely, warm, and happy, and you felt included and loved, you knew your real happiness lay in the dark-haired man who was constantly at your side. Your happiness, your warmth, your love, Loki.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> thanks for all the love ❤️ this is the end, at least for a long while. Hope you enjoyed it 😊


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